What Afghanistan?

[Anonymous Poster]

A week after the terrorist attacks, President Bush was invited to Kabul to
have dinner with the leader of Afghanistan in his mansion. When he got
there, he noticed that next to the leader was a panel of buttons. Halfway
into dinner he pushes one of the buttons and a giant hand comes out of the
wall and slaps bush. The Afghans present get a good laugh out of this.

As George gets up a few minutes later to use the bathroom, he presses another
button. This time a giant foot comes out of the wall and kicks him right in
the butt.

After he returns from the bathroom the leader presses one more button and
both the hand and the foot come out and slap and kick George around for a
little while. The whole time the Afghans are getting a huge laugh out of
this.

A week after that the leader of Afghanistan is invited to have dinner with
Bush in the White House. When he gets there he notices that Bush has a panel
as well, right next to him. A few minutes into the dinner George pushes one
of the buttons and the whole places starts rumbling. The leader gets
worried, but nothing happens, and they continue eating.

A few minutes later George pushes another button and more rumbling occurs and
eventually stops again. This time nervously the leader asks "What the hell
was that?"

Bush ignores him. A few more minutes later he pushes the button again and
even more rumbling than before occurs, and again with no effect. This time
The leader says "Okay that's it. This is really getting me nervous, I'm
going back to Afghanistan."

And Bush says "What Afghanistan?"

 

[RJohnson]

Three guys, a Canadian, ***** bin Ladin and
Uncle Sam are out walking together one day.
They come across a lantern and a Genie pops out
of it.

"I will give each of you each one wish, that's three
wishes total," says the Genie.

The Canadian says, "I am a farmer, my dad was a
farmer, and my son will also farm. I want the land to
be forever fertile in Canada."

With a blink of the Genie's eye, 'POOF' the land in Canada was
forever made fertile for farming.


***** bin Ladin was amazed, so he said, "I want a wall around
Afganistan, so that no infidels, Jews or Americans can come into our precious state."

Again, with a blink of the Genie's eye, 'POOF' there was a huge wall around Afganistan.


"Uncle Sam" (A former civil engineer), asks,
"I'm very curious. Please tell me more about this wall."
The Genie explains, "Well, it's about 15,000 feet high,
500 feet thick and completely surrounds the country;
nothing can get in or out---virtually impenetrable."

"UncleSam" says, "Fill it with water."

 

[Anonymous Poster]

<font color=blue>...Fill it with water...</font color=blue>

My feelings exactly... they need a nice lake over there...

 

[skent]

New map of the middle east. . . .

Steve

 

[skent]

Or along your lines. . . .

Steve

 

[ERNIEB]

A look in *****'s rearview mirror.

Ernie

 

[EdDekker]

Its off topic but the photo reminds me of a 2 1/2 minute web film "405: The Movie" Download and view it from http:// [url]www.405themovie.com [/url]

Ed

 

[RPM]

Wish there was an emoticon that had me rolling around laughing!!

 

[Anonymous Poster]

Patrick...

Didn't find a rolling one, but here's laughing...

 

[scruffy]

Now that hostilities have commenced....from our side, I can post this attachement.

 

[RJohnson]

Subject: Air show

First Annual Kabul Air Show Scheduled
(AP) Kabul, Afghanistan
17:52GMT - Sept. 20, 2001

Citizens of Afghanistan are reportedly looking forward with great anticipation to reports of an international air show to be held in the skies over their nation.

An unnamed official informed us that "Now the rest of the world will look upon our beloved city with great honor just as they do in Farnborough, England and Paris, France", referring to the sites of two other famous international air shows.

The exact date and time of the upcoming Kabul International Air Show has not yet been announced. It is believed that event organizers feel that such an announcement would detract from the fun of the celebration by, "spoiling the surprise".

Unlike most air shows the Kabul Air Show will feature almost no static ground displays but will have an unusually high number of aerial demonstrations and fly-bys. "We are most pleased by this feature of our air show. Instead of a lot of
different kinds of airplanes just sitting around on the tarmac, the aircraft attending our show will actually be up in the air demonstrating what they do best!" we were told.
Participation will probably be heaviest by aircraft of the United States Air Force and Marine Corps. Including appearances by F-15's, F-16's, A-10's, B-52's and Apache helicopters. It is rumored that opening ceremonies will feature a tomahawk-cruise fireworks display. A few B-2's, and F-117A's may also help out in some unseen capacity.

Several other counties have expressed an interest in sending representatives. These include all nineteen nations in the NATO alliance as well as Australia. The excitement generated for this gala event has even prompted the Israeli Air Force to apply for participation.

Of course, no one is more excited than the Afghan people themselves. Great numbers of them are in the streets of Kabul looking constantly heavenward in gratitude for the historic event, which will soon take place in their skies.

It has been observed that some are so concerned about missing the show that even as they bow to the East they keep snatching worried glances towards the West. Thousands, in fact, have been seen leaving the city and streaming to the mountains carrying food and blankets - obviously anxious to get a good vantage point for the air
show, and to make a picnic of it.


P.S.
I just got this today, and would'nt ya know it, we missed the opening ceremonies. But I hear that the repeat performances will go on for a while.

 

[RJohnson]

I am sure Bird will get a kick out of this but some of you non-Texas fellars may not. Anyhow enjoy/w3tcompact/icons/smile.gif.

"Apparently the Texas A&M ROTC has just surrounded a department store in College Station. They acted on a tip that Bed Linen is on the second floor."


or maybe you might enjoy this newflash:

The US government just announced that a crack team of commando's trained at Texas A&M have just raided the veterinary school at Texas A&M and captured all of the Afghans. They reported few casualties.


Have a great day.
Randy

 

[Bird]

Sounds about normal, Randy./w3tcompact/icons/laugh.gif

Bird

 

[glennmac]

Having lived in Austin for 3 years, sounds like a true Longhorn.

 

[ERNIEB]

Not necessarily Glenn, during the time I spent at A&M, Aggie joke books were sold in all the book stores. I don't think a week went by that I didn't hear 2 or 3. I guess Aggies like the jokes as much, if not more, than the tea sippers./w3tcompact/icons/smile.gif

Ernie