R.I.P crash325

[Crash325Daughter]

Well, I was shocked to find this when I was searching to find out if my father was living or dead. James Earl Johnson was my father, and he went by the name "Jim Johnson" from at least 1967 to 1996. He largely abandoned me in 1972 when he and my mother separated. I last saw him in 2006, when I stopped by his home in Escondido for one last chance for him to show some interest or care. I gave him all of my contact information, and I never heard from him. I occasionally searched to see if he had passed away over the years since. It took a crazy amount of an internet deep dive to find he was posting on this forum and that he had passed away.

I'm sorry to see that among the survivors, myself and a son he had before the marriage with my mother, were not mentioned. He also abandoned his son, and I only heard of him in 1991 when I got to spend some time with my grandmother.

I don't know what happened to Jim that made him abandon his children. It's not something I can imagine doing to my child. He never got to meet or even know of his amazing grandson because he chose not to be a part of his daughter's life. I saw him about five times before I was 18. Once he came to pick me up when I was 8 or 9. I was in the front yard with a friend, and he wasn't sure which of us was his daughter.

I got in touch with him again when I was an adult, and he didn't have the excuse of my mother being an issue (in truth, she wasn't). Again, it was all up to me to maintain the relationship. He talks about whether or not he's a good person in one of these threads. He was affable. I can't speak directly to what kind of person he was, except that he was the kind of person who was either unaware or didn't care about the hurt he caused one little girl in this world. I loved him and I wanted to have him in my life. I'm sorry for whatever may have happened that prevented him from having that.

 

[Buppies]

I am very sorry for your pain I cannot imagine. Prayers you somehow find the grace you deserve

 

[WinterDeere]

Very sorry to hear all of this. Hopefully being able to at least read his old posts brings you some closure or comfort.

 

[Cycledude]

Very sorry to see this, Crash was long gone before I ever even heard of tractor by net.
Reading what his daughter had to say makes me even more thankful for the family I grew up in.

 

[Crash325Daughter]

Thank you.

 

[Crash325Daughter]

Very sorry to hear all of this. Hopefully being able to at least read his old posts brings you some closure or comfort.

Thank you for your care and concern. It is interesting to read his posts. I do see there are some good gifts in my life that might not have happened if our family had stayed intact. I have a happy, long marriage (21 years), a great son, and my mother was wonderful and dedicated to her children (I have two half-siblings).

I didn't know my real grandfather's name until I saw his posts, which expanded the family tree. Jim was a successful entrepreneur for three decades, founding and owning several businesses, including an Arco Gas station and Johnstone Tire store in the 1970s, a turquoise jewelry design and making business in the 1980s, and a successful fine Jewelry store in the 1990s. He had remarried to a lovely woman in the 1990s, but I guess that marriage, too, ended in divorce or separation. Maybe that's how he ended up so destitute. It's also possible he was being less than honest on an internet forum.

I visited the jewelry store once. I can still hear the voice of a guy who worked for him saying, "You're his daughter? You should be picking through the cases!". I wasn't seeking jewelry or money, though the only thing he did do for me was cosign on a car loan, which I made sure to keep up with the monthly payments and paid off. He did pay the court-ordered child support, but I grew up in humble circumstances with a mother who worked full time and never remarried. She was dedicated to us.

Thank you for responding. It's an unexpected opportunity to discuss him because I have no connection to his family or anyone who knew him, but the people on this forum who truly seemed to care for him.

 

[tradosaurus]

Well, I was shocked to find this when I was searching to find out if my father was living or dead. James Earl Johnson was my father, and he went by the name "Jim Johnson" from at least 1967 to 1996. He largely abandoned me in 1972 when he and my mother separated. I last saw him in 2006, when I stopped by his home in Escondido for one last chance for him to show some interest or care. I gave him all of my contact information, and I never heard from him. I occasionally searched to see if he had passed away over the years since. It took a crazy amount of an internet deep dive to find he was posting on this forum and that he had passed away.

I'm sorry to see that among the survivors, myself and a son he had before the marriage with my mother, were not mentioned. He also abandoned his son, and I only heard of him in 1991 when I got to spend some time with my grandmother.

I don't know what happened to Jim that made him abandon his children. It's not something I can imagine doing to my child. He never got to meet or even know of his amazing grandson because he chose not to be a part of his daughter's life. I saw him about five times before I was 18. Once he came to pick me up when I was 8 or 9. I was in the front yard with a friend, and he wasn't sure which of us was his daughter.

I got in touch with him again when I was an adult, and he didn't have the excuse of my mother being an issue (in truth, she wasn't). Again, it was all up to me to maintain the relationship. He talks about whether or not he's a good person in one of these threads. He was affable. I can't speak directly to what kind of person he was, except that he was the kind of person who was either unaware or didn't care about the hurt he caused one little girl in this world. I loved him and I wanted to have him in my life. I'm sorry for whatever may have happened that prevented him from having that.

Love to hear the other side of the story. Might be worth getting a DNA test before throwing Mr. Johnson under the bus.

 

[Crash325Daughter]

Love to hear the other side of the story. Might be worth getting a DNA test before throwing Mr. Johnson under the bus.

I'll try to find a photo to share so you can see that it was clear he was my father. When I was born, the nurse told him, "You can't deny this one" because I looked so much like him.

I'm not throwing him under any bus. Like him, I'm sharing my side of the story. Of course, it's my version of it, as what he shared is his side. He was what he was, and I'm what I am. Good and bad. Neither of us is a villain or hero. Just two people who did (and do) the best they can.

 

[Crash325Daughter]

My mother and father took me to meet Sid when I was a baby.

 

[Sigarms]

Thank you for your care and concern. It is interesting to read his posts. I do see there are some good gifts in my life that might not have happened if our family had stayed intact. I have a happy, long marriage (21 years), a great son, and my mother was wonderful and dedicated to her children (I have two half-siblings).

You seem like a remarkable woman realizing that perhaps some good came out of the situation even though growing up you may not have seen it at the time.

I think that happens to a lot of us, but the problem becomes we tend to be bitter about the things we never got what we wanted out of life.

It sounds like you not only have been a remarkable person, but also blessed in the family that have stayed in your life and you realize that!

The way I see it, we all have some closure in our lives to deal with someone in our lives that will never seem to actually be closed for whatever reasons, but sooner or later we will no longer be on this earth, and I'd like to think that is when everyone will have their closure they are dealing with.