neighbors

[Jchonline]

I dont have neighbors! I live in the woods a 1/4 mile back. I can anything I want to and no one tells me different.

No sir you are incorrect. You have neighbors. They just havent built anything next to you yet!

 

[ruffdog]

No sir you are incorrect. You have neighbors. They just havent built anything next to you yet!

Different areas may have people crammed together more than others. Around me, it is common to have 100-200+ acre fields between houses while others may live where 1/4 acre lots are sold and developed.

 

[Clint S]

My uncle has been getting worse and worse like this. He lives just up the road. I would always help him get his hay in , fix his machines etc. Over the last few years anything I did was not quite good enough. Tedding hay being a tire width over to far . One day he even accused me of lying to him about tedding a field that I did in the afternoon and then next am . The last straw was him ripping me a new one over not pulling a ford 600 tire off a rim so he could clean the rim before a new tube could be put on. He was just NOT spending that 20 bucks to have a shop do it. I even offered to pay. He is almost 80, that rim clean or not will last longer than he is going to be able to use it. He also yelled at me for taking a trip to Ireland because he " needed help getting hay" that week. I would buy his hay at a discounted rate due to providing the labor. We now do not speak and he cannot get in any hay at all due to no labor from me. I now pay another guy just a little more and dont have to lift a finger. I feel bad and would do anything for him but I cannot take being berated and called a liar. Thanks for letting me rant here LOL. I feel better.

 

[Jstpssng]

My uncle has been getting worse and worse like this. He lives just up the road. I would always help him get his hay in , fix his machines etc. Over the last few years anything I did was not quite good enough. Tedding hay being a tire width over to far . One day he even accused me of lying to him about tedding a field that I did in the afternoon and then next am . The last straw was him ripping me a new one over not pulling a ford 600 tire off a rim so he could clean the rim before a new tube could be put on. He was just NOT spending that 20 bucks to have a shop do it. I even offered to pay. He is almost 80, that rim clean or not will last longer than he is going to be able to use it. He also yelled at me for taking a trip to Ireland because he " needed help getting hay" that week. I would buy his hay at a discounted rate due to providing the labor. We now do not speak and he cannot get in any hay at all due to no labor from me. I now pay another guy just a little more and dont have to lift a finger. I feel bad and would do anything for him but I cannot take being berated and called a liar. Thanks for letting me rant here LOL. I feel better.

Assuming he is suffering from the onset of dementia, it's a tough disease for everybody involved. You just have to remember that he isn't the person he used to be, but it's also out of his control. That is the only thing which I can think of which will make me accept that somebody isn't responsible for their actions... all that we can do is try to reduce/avoid the bad situations, as you apparently are doing.

 

[jmc]

"Trashy" seems to keep coming up with her. (I got those hints too, when I had neighbors.) You might ask your better neighbors if she has a point, and if you haven't written her off yet.

 

[ovrszd]

My uncle has been getting worse and worse like this. He lives just up the road. I would always help him get his hay in , fix his machines etc. Over the last few years anything I did was not quite good enough. Tedding hay being a tire width over to far . One day he even accused me of lying to him about tedding a field that I did in the afternoon and then next am . The last straw was him ripping me a new one over not pulling a ford 600 tire off a rim so he could clean the rim before a new tube could be put on. He was just NOT spending that 20 bucks to have a shop do it. I even offered to pay. He is almost 80, that rim clean or not will last longer than he is going to be able to use it. He also yelled at me for taking a trip to Ireland because he " needed help getting hay" that week. I would buy his hay at a discounted rate due to providing the labor. We now do not speak and he cannot get in any hay at all due to no labor from me. I now pay another guy just a little more and dont have to lift a finger. I feel bad and would do anything for him but I cannot take being berated and called a liar. Thanks for letting me rant here LOL. I feel better.

Sorry you had to go thru that.

My only Brother cost me many, many thousands of dollars thru lies and deception. We rarely speak. If he called and truly needed me I'd go help him. But I don't put myself in a monetary position with him anymore.

 

[jasonzee]

No sir you are incorrect. You have neighbors. They just havent built anything next to you yet!

The only ones are separated by field's

 

[Jchonline]

Different areas may have people crammed together more than others. Around me, it is common to have 100-200+ acre fields between houses while others may live where 1/4 acre lots are sold and developed.

Understood, but even someone that builds on 200 acres is a neighbor!

 

[ruffdog]

Understood, but even someone that builds on 200 acres is a neighbor!

Yes, but it is way different than areas that houses are crammed together so close you can hear when they are showering.

 

[Jstpssng]

We had big fields near us when I grew up, and a dairy just down the road. Now there's a Kohl's where the old farmhouse was, a WalMart where the Jerseys used to graze, and Home Depot where the milking and processing buildings were.

 

[Molalla1]

We had big fields near us when I grew up, and a dairy just down the road. Now there's a Kohl's where the old farmhouse was, a WalMart where the Jerseys used to graze, and Home Depot where the milking and processing buildings were.

Progress ??? :confused3:

 

[buckeyefarmer]

Yes, but it is way different than areas that houses are crammed together so close you can hear when they are showering.

And watch.

 

[Jstpssng]

Progress ??? :confused3:

Meanwhile I moved 200 miles north and built a small house where it used to be forest. If growth equals progress, that must be what it is.

My mother asked me if I would ever move back down that way, I admitted that I couldn't afford it.

 

[Clint S]

Assuming he is suffering from the onset of dementia, it's a tough disease for everybody involved. You just have to remember that he isn't the person he used to be, but it's also out of his control. That is the only thing which I can think of which will make me accept that somebody isn't responsible for their actions... all that we can do is try to reduce/avoid the bad situations, as you apparently are doing.

The sad thing is he has always been particular and wanted thing "his" was or no way. He has just got way worse. There is no dementia , just someone who cannot say, ''its done ok , but just not my way''. He has burned many bridges in his day...........

 

[Molalla1]

Meanwhile I moved 200 miles north and built a small house where it used to be forest. If growth equals progress, that must be what it is.

My mother asked me if I would ever move back down that way, I admitted that I couldn't afford it.

. . . my sainted mother passed some time ago . . . I hear you.

 

[9973720wb19]

familiarity breeds contempt

 

[3Ts]

My uncle has been getting worse and worse like this. He lives just up the road. I would always help him get his hay in , fix his machines etc. Over the last few years anything I did was not quite good enough. Tedding hay being a tire width over to far . One day he even accused me of lying to him about tedding a field that I did in the afternoon and then next am . The last straw was him ripping me a new one over not pulling a ford 600 tire off a rim so he could clean the rim before a new tube could be put on. He was just NOT spending that 20 bucks to have a shop do it. I even offered to pay. He is almost 80, that rim clean or not will last longer than he is going to be able to use it. He also yelled at me for taking a trip to Ireland because he " needed help getting hay" that week. I would buy his hay at a discounted rate due to providing the labor. We now do not speak and he cannot get in any hay at all due to no labor from me. I now pay another guy just a little more and dont have to lift a finger. I feel bad and would do anything for him but I cannot take being berated and called a liar. Thanks for letting me rant here LOL. I feel better.

Well, if it's any help, you're not the only one dealing with this. The result is not pretty. Sometimes, it best just to keep your distance.

 

[RalphVa]

Took my right hand neighbor his box accidently delivered to our house. Took it over in the tractor FEL. We get along great.

Not so left side. Was great for 18 years while they lived in Taxachusetts and rented the place out. Never any problems. They come back and proceed to cut our phone line in 2 places and declare their place off limits to anyone else. In the Good Samaritan story, there would be another paragraph to cover them. "And JM came along and kicked the guy off the road because HE did not belong on JM's side of the road."

Right now, peace. They seem to be gone to either Taxachusetts where they still seem to have an address or their PA place.

Ralph

 

[3Ts]

They come back and proceed to cut our phone line in 2 places and declare their place off limits to anyone else.

This just boggles my mind! I don't care if it is on someone else's property, a little consideration of others is always appropriate. Instead of cutting the line, it would have been better to ask for it to be moved out of their way. I know it happens and there are people that are very self-centered, but still ...

 

[fried1765]

I think your right about the historic relations. I did everything she wanted. When it stopped she got mad.
She is 73.

I would be willing to bet that she has reached the onset of Dementia.
Not anything you can do about that, except just steer clear of her.
I am 79, and see it all around me.
It does concern me, as my mother went that route.