Life's simple pleasures.

RSKY · Jan 16, 2017

One of the simple pleasures of being the father of daughters is drying and combing out their hair. Guess it is because you have a captive audience and can have a serious or not-so-serious conversation while doing so. Today was the first time I have been able to do this with my seven year old (I'm nearly eight granddaddy) granddaughter WITHOUT having to sit on her to hold her still.

She is becoming quite the beautiful, witty, young lady her mother was....... and still is. The next one is three and unlike her older cousin has always sat still for her hair drying. Haven't had the chance to do so for the smallest of the three. Now I have a grandson, wonder what that with bring.

Ah,.... the simple pleasures of being a granddad.

RSKY

Looking4new · Jan 16, 2017

I see fishing trips in the future.

Shaneard · Jan 16, 2017

That's awesome you have that relationship with them. I wish my kids grandparents had it, my in laws come to the house and are ready to leave when they get there and stay maybe 20 minutes. Our kids see them maybe 1 hour a month, they live 15 minutes from us. MIL is very controlling and always has to tell us how to raise them so we don't even bother going there. My parents see them maybe 2-3 hours a month, well my dad sees them more but we haven't been to their house in over 2 years, my mom has controlling hatred towards my wife so we don't go there either, they live 3 miles from us. We mostly stay home and enjoy them ourselves, lol. Kids are awesome!

All my grandparents passed away before I was born and I never got to experience those moments, I really wish my kids could enjoy time with theirs, we have tried to work things out on our end but they are a no budge crowd on their end. It for sure is their loss.

Thomas · Jan 16, 2017

Cherish those moments.

2LaneCruzer · Jan 17, 2017

Shaneard said:
That's awesome you have that relationship with them. I wish my kids grandparents had it, my in laws come to the house and are ready to leave when they get there and stay maybe 20 minutes. Our kids see them maybe 1 hour a month, they live 15 minutes from us. MIL is very controlling and always has to tell us how to raise them so we don't even bother going there. My parents see them maybe 2-3 hours a month, well my dad sees them more but we haven't been to their house in over 2 years, my mom has controlling hatred towards my wife so we don't go there either, they live 3 miles from us. We mostly stay home and enjoy them ourselves, lol. Kids are awesome!

All my grandparents passed away before I was born and I never got to experience those moments, I really wish my kids could enjoy time with theirs, we have tried to work things out on our end but they are a no budge crowd on their end. It for sure is their loss.

That's such a shame. I was the oldest grandchild on my Dad's side, and my granddad and I were best buddies. I loved him beyond description. I now have six grandchildren, and we love them to pieces. Three of them are grown, but we have spent considerable time with them; in fact we cared for the youngest three until they were old enough to go to school.

I can relate, however to your problem. Our kids had very little interaction with their grandparents for similar reasons that you describe. They have survived admirably, although there is that void in their lives. We figured that we would do our best for them and hopefully we can instill in them that sometimes adults, even those we love, can be irrational and hurtful, and that they are not to blame.

dmccarty · Jan 17, 2017

While these are treasured memories for the granddad, these will be priceless memories for the grand kids.

:thumbsup:

Later,
Dan

Shaneard · Jan 17, 2017

2LaneCruzer said:
That's such a shame. I was the oldest grandchild on my Dad's side, and my granddad and I were best buddies. I loved him beyond description. I now have six grandchildren, and we love them to pieces. Three of them are grown, but we have spent considerable time with them; in fact we cared for the youngest three until they were old enough to go to school.

I can relate, however to your problem. Our kids had very little interaction with their grandparents for similar reasons that you describe. They have survived admirably, although there is that void in their lives. We figured that we would do our best for them and hopefully we can instill in them that sometimes adults, even those we love, can be irrational and hurtful, and that they are not to blame.

I have come to realize things about my mom that I just swept under the rug for years and years. We try to raise our kids in a Christian environment and don't hang around what we know are bad influences. My dad was an alcoholic for years and I used to leave him notes around his hidden liquor bottles when I was a kid. I watched him hide it and I started drinking when I was 20 and turned into the same man he was. I quit drinking when my wife got pregnant with our son, I been sober for over 5 years. I know if I drink a little bit it will turn into full blown drunkenness so I just don't drink at all. I tell our kids all the time if you don't see mom and dad do it then we better not catch you doing it. That helps keep us straight too, lol. My parents are still married and so are my in laws. If my wife says her parents ask us to come eat or something I automatically put my defense up and despise dealing with them. Our son thinks I am the coolest thing on this Earth, I told him the other day when he grows up I don't want him to be like me, I want him to be better than me. Hopefully he realizes what I mean by that one day.

RSKY · Jan 17, 2017

We laugh about it but three of my four grands have been baby-sat by one of their great-great-aunts. She says she will keep the youngest for a day once he is six months or so. All of them know their aunts, uncles, greats, and great-greats.

One of the things my wife and I had going for us when we were raising our two was the knowledge that if anything ever happened to us the girls would have several families that would fight to be the ones to take them in. Just as we would have taken nieces, nephews, or cousins in and raised them.

Having a close family is a blessing that many in today's world miss out on.

RSKY

Gary Fowler · Jan 17, 2017

Shaneard said:
That's awesome you have that relationship with them. I wish my kids grandparents had it, my in laws come to the house and are ready to leave when they get there and stay maybe 20 minutes. Our kids see them maybe 1 hour a month, they live 15 minutes from us. MIL is very controlling and always has to tell us how to raise them so we don't even bother going there. My parents see them maybe 2-3 hours a month, well my dad sees them more but we haven't been to their house in over 2 years, my mom has controlling hatred towards my wife so we don't go there either, they live 3 miles from us. We mostly stay home and enjoy them ourselves, lol. Kids are awesome!

All my grandparents passed away before I was born and I never got to experience those moments, I really wish my kids could enjoy time with theirs, we have tried to work things out on our end but they are a no budge crowd on their end. It for sure is their loss.

That is so sad. I guess some parents just cant let their kids be parents too without trying to force their thinking onto them. By driving their children away, they miss the best part of life; being a grand parent.
I guess wife and I are lucky that all of our grand children got to be around us a lot. The first two pretty much stayed at our house more than their own and the first granddaughter still calls my wife "Mom" and here mother is Momma. This sure confuses a lot of folks who don't know who my granddaughter is. We never tried to run our kids life's but did offer advice when asked which is what parents should do.

hawkeye08 · Jan 17, 2017

Being a grand parent is wonderful. One of our daughters lives with us with her daughter and has given me the role of father and grand father. I do my best to honor the boundaries and so far it is working well. Our other grand daughter is 4 hours away so don't see them much, enjoy the time we get, but we don't dwell on it.

Gunny · Jan 17, 2017

I had the opportunity to brush and tie up my youngest granddaughters hair the other day and I remembered that the last time I'd done that, it was her mother, at about the same age. Just about brought tears to my eyes

jerrybob · Jan 17, 2017

Grandkids are your reward for not killing your children years ago when they were growing up.

Luke'sScreenName · Jan 17, 2017

RSKY said:
We laugh about it but three of my four grands have been baby-sat by one of their great-great-aunts. She says she will keep the youngest for a day once he is six months or so. All of them know their aunts, uncles, greats, and great-greats.

One of the things my wife and I had going for us when we were raising our two was the knowledge that if anything ever happened to us the girls would have several families that would fight to be the ones to take them in. Just as we would have taken nieces, nephews, or cousins in and raised them.

Having a close family is a blessing that many in today's world miss out on.

RSKY

Think about people without that safety net. One small misfortune (mistake or happenstance) can totally lead them down a different path.

At the right time $500 and a place to stay saved my rear once. Without it I don't think I'd be who I am today and haven't forgotten it.

TripleR · Jan 17, 2017

We've been lucky enough to have close relationships with our grand kids and now have two great grand kids. The other night our nine year old grand daughter baked a cake and made sure there was enough for me and my wife, she had her dad bring it up around eight pm.

hawkeye08 · Jan 17, 2017

It seems no one prints pictures any more. I was talking about it with one of my daughters a few months ago, she printed a bunch of pictures at Costco and bought a couple of photo albums... I started printing pictures from my phone on printer at home.. grand daughter wants a new picture every day now. She loves putting the photo paper in the printer and watching it print and waiting for it to dry completely so she can handle it. I am teaching her to count while she waits for a picture to dry. I also bought some 12 quart storage bins at Costco recently and asked her if she wanted to borrow one to play with.. she had all 6 in use within 30 minutes. I printed labels for them, numbering them 1-6. We count bins now also.

MossRoad · Jan 17, 2017

RSKY said:
One of the simple pleasures of being the father of daughters is drying and combing out their hair. Guess it is because you have a captive audience and can have a serious or not-so-serious conversation while doing so. Today was the first time I have been able to do this with my seven year old (I'm nearly eight granddaddy) granddaughter WITHOUT having to sit on her to hold her still.

She is becoming quite the beautiful, witty, young lady her mother was....... and still is. The next one is three and unlike her older cousin has always sat still for her hair drying. Haven't had the chance to do so for the smallest of the three. Now I have a grandson, wonder what that with bring.

Ah,.... the simple pleasures of being a granddad.

RSKY

I hear ya!

We have two daughters. Both had extremely fine, long blonde hair. Down to the back of their knees! Their little arms weren't long enough to comb or brush it out after a wash. :laughing: It was my job to comb and braid after a wash just about every night. My wife wanted them to cut it, but they wanted it long. Only question was loose pony tail or tight pony tail? Had to keep it braided or it would be a rat's nest in a couple hours. It was always funny when there were special occasions at school, they'd wear their hair styled instead of a braided pony tail. All the other kids and parents would be amazed at their hair.

Both of them have black belts in Karate. They'd be out there in their white gi punching, kicking and their pony tails swinging around while doing spinning kicks. It was quite the sight.

Anyhow, we made deals with them. When they turned 12, they had to take care of it themselves. Within months, each one realized what a pain it is to comb it out, so both cut it off below shoulder length and donated it to Locks of Love. Both have since grown it out and donated it again a couple times. Good kids.

If anyone's interested....

Locks of Love is a public non-profit organization that provides hairpieces to financially disadvantaged children in the United States and Canada under age 21 suffering from long-term medical hair loss from any diagnosis.

Locks of Love - Official Website

Shaneard · Jan 24, 2017

My inlaws called last week and ask to speak to our son (he's 4) he ask them to come see what he was doing, they said okay. They called back 30 minutes later and said they couldn't make it today they will come by tomorrow (Thursday the 19th). Son was sad etc. They didn't come Thursday, didn't call. Saw them Saturday morning at his basketball game and no mention of why they stood him up, again. Have I mentioned they are retired and live 15 minutes away? If you tell your grandkids something please stick to your word, they will remember the times they spent with you but they will remember the times you told them you were gonna do something and didn't more. For those of you who try and do spend time with your kids/grandkids good for you!

MossRoad · Jan 24, 2017

I have fond memories of my grandparents on both my mother and father's side. My mom's dad would visit for one week once a year, and we'd visit down there once every year or two if possible. Other than that, we never saw him, but man, we'd look forward to it because he was fun! My dad's folks were quite reserved. However, we still looked forward to seeing them about every other weekend in summer when they'd come into town from the cottage to check their house and rental properties and their city garden.

I find it kind of odd, yet understand, how some folks get along and some folks don't. I've met plenty of folks that don't get along with their inlaws for any number of reasons. Yet about half of those that don't get along with their inlaws, have kids that have great relationships with those same inlaw grandparents. Never know what makes people click and not click.
:confused3: