Getting an annual physical at the doctors

[Torvy]

^that could have been me. Fortunately, mom made it through the troubles. Retired RN. Daily Mass warrior. They were actually married in San Jose in 1955.

 

[ultrarunner]

San Jose California, St. Martins, 1959…

RN 2 blocks away at O’Conner Hospital…

Moved to Oakland in the 1960’s…

I have wondered how different life might have been had mom and dad not relocated to Oakland to be closer to Dads family… several generations in Oakland at that time and now just me…

 

[Torvy]

San Jose California, St. Martins, 1959…

RN 2 blocks away at O’Conner Hospital…

I don't remember which parish. The family lore is that it burned down shortly after.

I don't know if I ever knew the hospital in which she worked. Her and dad met at a USO thing. Her older sister (also RN) had moved out there and mom went there for work.

 

[ultrarunner]

Mom met dad on a blind date set up by her nursing supervisor… mom had no intentions of dating and was in California as part of a nursing exchange program…

Mom’s supervisor said let’s make it a foursome so supervisor and her husband “Chaperoned” the date.

Mom said Dad was a very nice guy and sure he had no problem getting dates but mom’s focus was returning to the Catholic nursing order of nuns…

Anyway… back to annual physicals… many here missed several years of physicals, blood tests, etc… as routine medical all but shutdown during much of Covid… even today it’s common for doctor offices to require masks to enter and I go through 50-75 each morning in the public lobby where masks are NOT required but available.

The last 6 months of 2023 surgery was quite busy as people that had put off procedures plus newly injured are back…

I’m on the surgery side of things.

 

[Torvy]

Last post on the sidebar...checked with mom. St. Patrick's (now our Lady of La Vang). San Jose Hospital...went to daily mass nearby at Cathedral.

When I was working full time, finding time for medical, dental or vision visits was tough. Easier to just go when 100% necessary.

Plan for this year is to start getting those done.

 

[Fuddyduddy1952]

Alzheimer's sucks.

That's why the new lady friends.
That happened to our 88 y.o. neighbor, wife dies and he has alzheimers so he finds a 40 y.o. lady friend, gets married and ends up in jail after finding her looking for money and valuables and smacked her.
With help from his daughter & her husband he's bailed out & gets a divorce.
Then he gets caregivers who are pretty, we see them driving a new car, etc.

 

[Sigarms]

My Grandfather always wanted to be cremated and so he was. He wanted his ashes dispersed on his farm. My grandmother couldn't bear the thought of that so she had his ashes buried!
That meant they had to be placed in a concrete vault and I believe it cost about $10K, (1985).

We put our son's ashes on his favorite place where he'd sit out in the back in the woods overlooking the creek. No cost.

Have no clue why even in 1985 you would have to place cremated ashes in a vault?

That said, went to a funeral here in NC where the body was laid to rest in the back yard. After looking, only like 4 states outlaw private burials on your own property.

 

[ultrarunner]

Seems elderly well to do men have more options than women in the same situation.

I was surprised to know several... mostly retired military that basically said chuck it and are now expats in the Philippines with wives 30 and 40 years their junior and quite happy about it.

They do have military connected health options in the Philippines and more in Guam.

One guy just turned 70 and wife is mid 30's... he was back for a short business trip itching to return to the Philippines and he spent time there in the service as a very young guy.

He did say medical is a concern but not going to live the sunset of life in worry...

Maybe moving to a place with more bang for the buck has a positive effect on well being as in quality over longevity???

 

[Jstpssng]

mom was not able to understand why everything changed… why could no longer visit with cherished neighbors… why no one came to visit… no contact with loved ones and as a daily attendee of Catholic Mass… no more mass

We made a lot of choices back then which were based on emergency dialogs. It was supposed to be temporary, yet got dragged out for whatever reason. Now it seems some of those "temporary measures" have become long term, and I wonder what we have given up.
For 3 years my mother said we'd have a family gathering "When things settle down." Now at 86 she still mentions it, but when it comes down to it she doesn't like a lot of people around.

 

[Fuddyduddy1952]

We put our son's ashes on his favorite place where he'd sit out in the back in the woods overlooking the creek. No cost.

Have no clue why even in 1985 you would have to place cremated ashes in a vault?

That said, went to a funeral here in NC where the body was laid to rest in the back yard. After looking, only like 4 states outlaw private burials on your own property.

It was a family plot, pre-paid graves for grandparents & their (Downs Syndrome) son.
To me a lot of funerals and cemeteries is a racket. The family is distraught and many times buy the more expensive coffin, flowers, service. His wish was ashes on his land...but what to do about grandmother?
The funeral home insisted on if buried of course in a vault 6 ft. deep. They made a major production out of it ($$$).
My other grandfather was a Mason. My Dad received a plaque & two screws. Cemetery wanted $300 to install it. Dad & I went to grave, Dad "installed it" in two minutes with pocket screwdriver. This was years ago.

 

[Sigarms]

To me a lot of funerals and cemeteries is a racket. The family is distraught and many times buy the more expensive coffin, flowers, service. His wish was ashes on his land...but what to do about grandmother?

I think funeral homes are a lot like realtors and lawyers. The industry gets a bad name because of those out there that don't do what they love to do.

My father and son passed away last year, and the funeral home was great to deal with in both cases (during that time nothing really is "great" at that moment in time) and never felt like we were "bent over". Biggest expense at the time was my dad as we had to take his ashes up to a national cemetary up in Pa, and the funeral home up there coordinated with the cemetary the funeral procession. That said, we had a service at the funeral home for everyone. Still wasn't that much for the day IMO. Biggest bill was probably the meals and free booze LOL

When your kind of numb, it's nice to have people care in what they do to make your life easier by walking you through everything. I'm kind of cheap, and never did it cross my mind "wow, that sure is expensive".

That said, the only "real" funeral I dealt with was my aunts about 15 years ago. Belive the "standard" cost for a burial plot, casket and the whole nine yards is like 8K?

Cremation and everything involved I think was around 1k. I don't need my body in one piece when I'm dead, and all things considered, cremation IMO is a much easier process all the way around.

That said, when my aunt found out that my dad was being cremated, she mentioned that our chuch doesn't believe in that. End of the day, I believe a omnipotent God really cares. What, fill your body up with chemicals so you can look "normal" longer thann usual when dead? Going to be turned into worm food anyways.

 

[ultrarunner]

We made a lot of choices back then which were based on emergency dialogs. It was supposed to be temporary, yet got dragged out for whatever reason. Now it seems some of those "temporary measures" have become long term, and I wonder what we have given up.
For 3 years my mother said we'd have a family gathering "When things settle down." Now at 86 she still mentions it, but when it comes down to it she doesn't like a lot of people around.

It took mom's passing in 2023 to gather everyone...

I was looking around and thinking how much she would have loved seeing everyone.

Her pleasures were simple... helping neighbors, going for walks or a hike and gardening... raising an abundance of produce to give away although she did sell her prized organic mission figs for years as the market owner wanted all she could bring.

Even having a family niche at the Columbarium and urn the associated costs excluding funeral totaled $4500

From Great Grandmother to parents and uncles together it was my Grandmother that pulled it all together to one location... The the Great Greats are buried nearby within walking distance.

The place was designed by Julia Morgan and shares features and design elements with Hearst Castle.

Mom several times pointed out there is room for me! She would visit every Friday with fresh flowers from her garden...

 

[Fuddyduddy1952]

My wish for my last day would be crawling off into the woods letting the buzzards and coyotes have me!

 

[Jstpssng]

My wish for my last day would be crawling off into the woods letting the buzzards and coyotes have me!

That's one of my options when I'm through. Sit in a chair some cold rainy night amidst the burying spots of my dogs, and go out with happy memories.

 

[ultrarunner]

My wish for my last day would be crawling off into the woods letting the buzzards and coyotes have me!

Throw in bears and you will have lots of options and don't forget sharks.

 

[MossRoad]

We've always been happy with the two local funeral homes I've dealt with so many times over the years. One of the cemeteries, on the other hand, has been quite the disappointment. It has been sold several times, they don't maintain if very well, and I told them if I had the means, I'd dig up my entire family and move them to another cemetery.

Cemeteries are supposed to put money aside for maintenance forever. However, it's pretty clear this one isn't doing it.

 

[gsganzer]

I just had my annual on Wednesday. Blood work came back OK, except for high white blood cell count. Wouldn't it figure that I have the crud right now.

 

[Too many Kubotas]

Speaking of funeral costs.

It's a long story, but an ordered Challenger Hellcat Redeye (not an inexpensive vehicle) at a very small dealership eventually ended up being bought by a local mortician.

It sure seemed like that car sure was possessed, but that only made it more ironic.

 

[QRTRHRS]

My wife and i were discussing our future and i told her that i want to be cremated. She said that was against the bible. I said really, was the earth not born of fire? Then she said well then what about your ashes? I very seriously told her to get an empty Jack Daniels or similar bottle. Fill it with my ashes, drive down the road until you see a concrete bridge abutment and have at it. Whack!

 

[CalG]

December 21st, texted the neighbors wife asking if her husband could lend me an extra set of hands (he doesn't use a cell phone LOL). Wife mentioned he wasn't feeling well. Mentioned no problem and let me know if I could help in any way.

December 24th, stopped in on the way back from Church to visit them to make sure everything was ok. Found out my neigbor had lung cancer, stage 4.

Early morning December 31st, neighbor called to let me know her husband passed away.

Reality is he was fit as a fiddle at age 76.

Basically in less than a month when his wife kind of forced him to to the doctors because he wasn't feeling well, he is no longer here.

We took some home baked food over last night. He was blessed because he was able to stay in his house during his short time left with his family at home.

He smoked regularly.

Point being, when we get older, even if you're fit at an older age, make sure you get a physical once a year.

Guy and his wife have always been great neighbors. Kind of the neighbors where when we get together and talk, it's never a short session.

And just how would getting a "physical" lengthened his enjoyable life?
Cancer= worry=treatment=suffering=death every day for as long as it lasts.

Screw that, die once!