i'm newly single and i'm going to start dating. but going out seems really expensive these days. i'm not poor but i don't want to become so. I'm a good cook but i think for at least a first date i would want to go out somewhere. i'm 63. i live way out of town and when i factor in the gas to go pick up someone and then go to a restaurant and then do the reverse a date will cost at least $75. what do guys do to keep dating from busting the budget?
Cheap date
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To me, I would think that you'd be out that $75 minimum at least two or three times, just establishing some type of relationship, then after the two of you have gotten to know one another and found out a few likes and dislikes, then tailor things out. If it's someone you know really well, then you may not be too far offline to suggest her over for a meal, someone you've recently met may not be very comfortable with the same invitation.
I met my wife on a blind date, so to make things more comfortable for her, several of our dates after that were in her hometown, just so she would be in surroundings she was familiar with. Once we'd gotten to know each other quite a bit better, we started going further out and doing different things. About the fourth date in her hometown, I found out that she loved cooking out, so it was easy to suggest that we do some of that, first at her house, later on at my house, since I had a much better setup for that type of function. Also, working together in the kitchen getting things ready seemed to really help in getting to know each other better, plus we got experience in working together.
Now, 24 years later, I still think about how hard I tried to get out of that blind date!
By the way, I really don't think you'd get by on $75 for a good meal, if you really want to impress the lady. I know now that if I'd ever suggested to my then future wife that we go to McDonald's, that would probably have been our last date! She's not one of those high maintenance women, but she sure hates fast food!
Good luck
I met my wife on a blind date, so to make things more comfortable for her, several of our dates after that were in her hometown, just so she would be in surroundings she was familiar with. Once we'd gotten to know each other quite a bit better, we started going further out and doing different things. About the fourth date in her hometown, I found out that she loved cooking out, so it was easy to suggest that we do some of that, first at her house, later on at my house, since I had a much better setup for that type of function. Also, working together in the kitchen getting things ready seemed to really help in getting to know each other better, plus we got experience in working together.
Now, 24 years later, I still think about how hard I tried to get out of that blind date!
By the way, I really don't think you'd get by on $75 for a good meal, if you really want to impress the lady. I know now that if I'd ever suggested to my then future wife that we go to McDonald's, that would probably have been our last date! She's not one of those high maintenance women, but she sure hates fast food!
Good luck
MikeInEburg
Veteran Member
I don't think a first date needs to be a five-star restaurant. Most towns have a couple of little pubs with decent food. I think $50 would get you a nice meal, a couple of drinks, and still have change in your pocket.
smstonypoint
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1. Arrange a "lunch" date -- lunches are less expensive.
2. Go to restaurants that offer the following: senior discounts, coupons, "early-bird" specials, "buy one entree, get one free" specials, etc.
3. Order water with your meal.
4. Ask her to pick up the tip.
Steve
i agree with this. i searched for romantic restaurants (which i think means no loud kids)in this area, the NRV in VA, and all of them would end up being $75 at least just for the meal and that's not counting the cost of driving. so i decided to forget romantic and just go for good tasting food and i think i can do that for $50-$60.
EddieWalker
Epic Contributor
I was single for 3 years after my divorce and went on a lot of first dates. I found that what is really important on the first date is being someplace comfortable where you can talk and get to know each other. Starbucks is great for this. It keeps it casual and relaxed without any pressure. If it was for dinner, I found that Mexican restaurants are almost universally liked by everyone. It's casual, fairly quite where you can always start off by talking about the food and other Mexican restaurants.
One thing that I found that helps keep things relaxed and comfortable is to meet her at the restaurant. Very few women now a days want to tell a stranger where they live. This also allows you to end it without any drama or awkwardness if things don't go well. You just go your own way after you eat and avoid the awkwardness of driving her home if the date is a disaster.
You didn't say where or how you are meeting single women. If it is somebody you already know then by all means, pick her up and take her out somewhere fancy. But if it's somebody that you have just met and barely know, then be careful, cautious and remember that there are just as many crazy stalker chicks out there as guys.
I found online dating to be the very best way to meet single women. I was on Match.com and highly recommend it. there are others, and I'm sure it varies by where you are in the country as to what ones are the best in your area. I met Karen on there, and we will be together one year on the 30th of this month. I've met some great friends on there, and some crazy people. It's like anything else, the good and the bad, but what I like about it so much is that you get to filter out who you meet by reading their profile and seeing if there is anything more to them then just their looks.
Good luck,
Eddie
One thing that I found that helps keep things relaxed and comfortable is to meet her at the restaurant. Very few women now a days want to tell a stranger where they live. This also allows you to end it without any drama or awkwardness if things don't go well. You just go your own way after you eat and avoid the awkwardness of driving her home if the date is a disaster.
You didn't say where or how you are meeting single women. If it is somebody you already know then by all means, pick her up and take her out somewhere fancy. But if it's somebody that you have just met and barely know, then be careful, cautious and remember that there are just as many crazy stalker chicks out there as guys.
I found online dating to be the very best way to meet single women. I was on Match.com and highly recommend it. there are others, and I'm sure it varies by where you are in the country as to what ones are the best in your area. I met Karen on there, and we will be together one year on the 30th of this month. I've met some great friends on there, and some crazy people. It's like anything else, the good and the bad, but what I like about it so much is that you get to filter out who you meet by reading their profile and seeing if there is anything more to them then just their looks.
Good luck,
Eddie
MtnViewRanch
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1. Arrange a "lunch" date -- lunches are less expensive.
2. Go to restaurants that offer the following: senior discounts, coupons, "early-bird" specials, "buy one entree, get one free" specials, etc.
3. Order water with your meal.
4. Ask her to pick up the tip.
Steve
I have to say, I think that # 1 is the only part of that recommendation that would fly for the first date, that is if you might want a 2nd date.
Carl_NH
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Well, you are most interested in finding out about each other and focus less on food. Once you get to know each other likes and dislikes, a spendier dinner may be in order.
Also, a weekend date, a Saturday afternoon or a Sunday brunch is not expensive and assume you need to "go to town" yourself once a week, so combine your trips. Or decide to meet at a destination - like a (tractor) museum, go to a fair, or a comedy club etc.
at this point i know the women i want to take out and plan to ask one of them out next week. i don't anticipate any problem finding women to date in the age range i'm looking for. but now eddie's got me wondering what would turn up on match.com.
smstonypoint
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I have to say, I think that # 1 is the only part of that recommendation that would fly for the first date, that is if you might want a 2nd date.
Well, he said he didn't want to bust his budget.
Steve
NoTrespassing
Elite Member
After my ex left for greener pastures I tried to meet someone locally without much success. I was in a little different situation being 41 at the time. Most of the ladies I met had a lot of baggage (ex husbands, ex boy freinds, kids etc.) that I wasn't willing to deal with. At some point I decided long distance online dating was worth a try. After "meeting" several ladies from foreign contries I really hit it off with one in particular. Our "dates" were as cheap as you can get and usually consisted of a 1 or 2 hour chat on camera. After a year of chatting the really expensive date happened. It cost me about $3K and lasted 2 weeks although one could consider it a vacation rather than a date We were married in 2007, about 22 months after we met online.
In my opinion, long distance online dating can be just as fullfilling as dating in person and a lot less expensive.
We were married in 2007, about 22 months after we met online.In my opinion, long distance online dating can be just as fullfilling as dating in person and a lot less expensive.
bullbreaker
Elite Member
IMO the best place to meet women is at your local church if you attend one or Wallmart . At Wallmart just grab a shopping cart (empty),head for produce area and when Ya see a gal that you think might tickle your fancy, bump into her cart with yours , apologize for your lack of driving skills and start feeding her your lines.
Also hangin out front with a real cute puppy as bait for conversation works even better !
" My granpa Wyatt used to tell me at about when I turned 14". "Boy if on your first date the woman pays for everything it's probably a man in a dress" ! :laughing:
Also hangin out front with a real cute puppy as bait for conversation works even better !
" My granpa Wyatt used to tell me at about when I turned 14". "Boy if on your first date the woman pays for everything it's probably a man in a dress" ! :laughing:
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Well, he said he didn't want to bust his budget.
Steve
True, but I would think that he would want more than a lot of first dates. Maybe not, and it sounds as if these are women that he already knows anyway, so maybe anything goes? Don't know, haven't been there for quite some time now.
not sure what i want at this point. i think anything goes though with women i know. i will need to adjust my budget to allow more for entertainment. i work part time at a CPA firm (during tax season) that's loaded with professional single women. the rest of the year i farm and sell at the farmers market where there is endless contact with lots of women. i'm glad my kids are all grown up and on their own. the last time i divorced i had a 3 year old daughter.
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i also found my wife on match.com after being married to my wife for 32 years she died of cancer.it was about 1.5 years and then went onto match.com and found it to be a great way to meet.
CobyRupert
Super Member
Then it's probably cheaper in the long run to get one of those "dates" where you pay her the $75 directly.
Just ask any divorced (or married) man!
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i like that. you must not be married or confident your wife isn't going to see this.Then it's probably cheaper in the long run to get one of those "dates" where you pay her the $75 directly.
i signed up for match.com but didn't pay the fee. there's alot of women on there. i didn't look to see how many men there are.
nc redneck
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A buddy of mine recently divorced signed up for match.com. According to him he was overrun with emails and requests. He had to trim it back to only 5 women he was interested in. He does have a good job and lives in the triangle area of NC.
luvmexfood
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Just watch till you really get to know them. Had one sneaking my debit cards out after she had watched me to see what the PIN number was. Hit me for about $4500 till I saw bank statement. Placed just a little over 50 felony charges on her. While she was out on bail she did it to someone else. It happened in Oct of2012 and she still has not gone to trial. I did get my money back from banks because I agreed to proscute. Did get the pleasure of helping the State Police of luring her out of hiding after I agreed to take her shopping. When she was jerked out of my car by the State Police you should have seen how big her eyes got. She had gotten into more serious trouble and they needed her to get some information on someone else.
Chilly807
Elite Member
I met my present wife through an online dating service. I've gotta say though, it was an adventure.. it was pretty easy to tell why a lot of the women were single.
I remember one had 4 kids, and was pining for more. I like kids, but more than 4.. really?
Another had her whole life planned out, her biggest challenge was how she was going to "fit" me in to it. Mm hmm..
I soon learned that unless they asked questions, the best thing I could do was just nod and listen, the crazy ones were soon smoked out. Some had that figured out too, the more I said the worse it got. Go figure.
One had a psycho-ex-boyfriend that actually had me worried. I liked her, but she wasn't worth the trouble up front.
And my personal favourite, (other than the one I married), was the really gorgeous 35 year old. We spent a lunch date together, and by the time it was done so was I. I remember telling her, "I think I see why you're still single, you're nothing short of a bitc*!"
I did meet some sweet women that just had no chemistry with, some pretty, some plain, some I'm still friends with.
I guess the best advice I could give you.. at your age, start as you mean to continue.
Most women, at least the ones that are worth having anyway, know what they want by that age, and aren't shy about saying something. If they haven't got it figured out by now they never will.
If you're not a moonlight, candles and roses kinda guy, why give them the impression you are? If a diner date (yeah, that's diner, not dinner) is your style, then go for it. At least you're being straight with her, this is what she can expect in the future.
Now, I will suggest a diner where neither of you live next door.. nothing worse than friends dropping in and chatting with you (or her!) while you're trying to get to know each other. And if it doesn't go well, having your buddies see you wearing a plate of spaghetti like a hat is a hard thing to live down..
Sean
I remember one had 4 kids, and was pining for more. I like kids, but more than 4.. really?
Another had her whole life planned out, her biggest challenge was how she was going to "fit" me in to it. Mm hmm..
I soon learned that unless they asked questions, the best thing I could do was just nod and listen, the crazy ones were soon smoked out. Some had that figured out too, the more I said the worse it got. Go figure.
One had a psycho-ex-boyfriend that actually had me worried. I liked her, but she wasn't worth the trouble up front.
And my personal favourite, (other than the one I married), was the really gorgeous 35 year old. We spent a lunch date together, and by the time it was done so was I. I remember telling her, "I think I see why you're still single, you're nothing short of a bitc*!"
I did meet some sweet women that just had no chemistry with, some pretty, some plain, some I'm still friends with.
I guess the best advice I could give you.. at your age, start as you mean to continue.
Most women, at least the ones that are worth having anyway, know what they want by that age, and aren't shy about saying something. If they haven't got it figured out by now they never will.
If you're not a moonlight, candles and roses kinda guy, why give them the impression you are? If a diner date (yeah, that's diner, not dinner) is your style, then go for it. At least you're being straight with her, this is what she can expect in the future.
Now, I will suggest a diner where neither of you live next door.. nothing worse than friends dropping in and chatting with you (or her!) while you're trying to get to know each other. And if it doesn't go well, having your buddies see you wearing a plate of spaghetti like a hat is a hard thing to live down..
Sean
