How would you handle this neighbor issue?

   / How would you handle this neighbor issue? #51  
I would'nt have any dealings with those people at all.. they will sue you as soon as they get the chance.. If they even remotely think you have any kind of money watch out.. I would also make sure they physically cannot enter your property..
 
   / How would you handle this neighbor issue? #52  
I have been dealing with neighbor that pulled a corner pin and hammered it back (could see the marks on the cap) for 10 years. The 100' markers posts have been removed by them etc. Stick with your survery plan and make the posts as permanent as possible.

In New Hampshire it's a crime to remove boundary markers (momuments).
 
   / How would you handle this neighbor issue? #53  
I keep trying to look at things from their perspective and to a point I could understand where the wife was coming from but I don't know the particulars of what happened as it was quite a few years ago but the husband just baffles me as I can't see any reason how anyone could intentionally blow grass clippings on a person standing 3' away from them on the boundry while making eye contact.

You can never tell what someone might be thinking. Especially someone whom you have never met or even talked to.
These people obviously don't think like you, so your not going to be able to think like them, and that seems to me to be a good thing.
It's in your best interest to discover what they are about first, and then decide the best way to deal with them.
To this end, I suggest you get to a point where you can have a conversation, and I wouldn't necessarily be overly polite about it.
I'm going to guess that these people won't recognize bad manners quickly, so the first chance you get..... get thier attention and find out what's up, and what thier concerns are. You may find they are just a bunch of paranoid idiots, you may find they have some specific concerns, coupled with bad information and a poor intelect. That's always a bad combination.
I find it hard to believe that the grass incident was anything other than an intended insult, so for some reason or another they are not happy.
 
   / How would you handle this neighbor issue? #54  
I didn't read all the posts but no sidearms that escalate the issue. The point is to diffuse and not engage. Get the survey and while that's in progress get a copy of "The Gift of Fear...Survival Skills." . This is standard stuff for cops and helps you identify just who in life is a threat and who is just full of it. My guess is your goobers are broke and have nothing but words and minor deeds to try to scare you away. Read the book.
The goal here is no escalation. Do the survey, flag it and avoid them. If you have any unintended contact be carfeful with threats. Just don't make any. If they threaten you make notes and tell them you do not want to escalate the situation and don't want to call the sheriff but good fences make good neighbors and the issue is pretty clear here.
If they had a reasonable sense of the law they would never have blown grass on you or your side. That is truly stupid and reveals their ignorance of issues that matter. Do the survey, read the book, no escalate and keep growing those concord grapes.
 
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   / How would you handle this neighbor issue? #55  
I wonder if you have talked to the widow lady about those people? I don't remember seeing that in any previous posts. (If I missed that I'm sorry). She may know something about their history that could help you. I still believe the wife is running things and she told him not to talk to you. Good luck.
 
   / How would you handle this neighbor issue?
  • Thread Starter
#56  
I didn't read all the posts but no sidearms that escalate the issue. The point is to diffuse and not engage. Get the survey and while that's in progress get a copy of "The Gift of Fear...Survival Skills." . This is standard stuff for cops and helps you identify just who in life is a threat and who is just full of it. My guess is your goobers are broke and have nothing but words and minor deeds to try to scare you away. Read the book.
The goal here is no escalation. Do the survey, flag it and avoid them. If you have any unintended contact be carfeful with threats. Just don't make any. If they threaten you make notes and tell them you do not want to escalate the situation and don't want to call the sheriff but good fences make good neighbors and the issue is pretty clear here.
If they had a reasonable sense of the law they would never have blown grass on you or your side. That is truly stupid and reveals their ignorance of issues that matter. Do the survey, read the book, no escalate and keep growing those concord grapes.

Exactly, nothing is gained by escalating conflict. I learned that years ago and have no intentions of trying to contact these neighbors ever again. I will survey and post the boundry and stay on my own land and take away any reason for them to come on my land since the only reason they do now is to mow part of mine. When that grass is dead there is no need to mow it. If I have enough room I will dig an open ditch but other wise I will run a tile and keep everything on my side and just continue on my happy way :)

I do love farming in general and growing grapes is very rewarding. Its a very exciting time for me, I have been building my farm for 8 years now. I started out by buying $30k worth of hay equipment (already owned a tractor for the property) when I didn't have a single hay field. I was able to learn the first year from my ex's family and bale for them and that first year was a very busy year as I had people asking me to bale their fields all around me. A few years after that I got into grapes when I bought my old neighbors farm. There were 3.5 acres of concords there. Once I started buying the equipment to work in the vineyard the drive was on to expand and add more vineyards to help justify better and more dedicated vineyard equipment. I have been having so much fun between haying and working the vineyards I try not to let these little things bother me. I do appreciate having this board to come to though when I look for advice on certain situations like this one. Some times I get so wrapped up in my own little world that I may not notice where I did something wrong so I come on here and if the majority of the members here feel I mis-stepped then I learn from that. If they feel I did nothing wrong then I know my own thoughts were justified :thumbsup:

I've done a very good job of weeding out drama from my life. If I see potential problems then I steer clear of the people. I don't need the stress, haying is stressful enough for me so if I make it through hay season I need the rest of the year to recover:laughing:
 
   / How would you handle this neighbor issue?
  • Thread Starter
#57  
I wonder if you have talked to the widow lady about those people? I don't remember seeing that in any previous posts. (If I missed that I'm sorry). She may know something about their history that could help you. I still believe the wife is running things and she told him not to talk to you. Good luck.

I have not asked her about this particular neighbor but I will bring it up the next time I see her. The estate just accepted the offer on the last two parcels we decided to buy so I will now own right up to her farm (there was a 35 acre parcel between us). I am having that parcel surveyed on three corners (one corner only touches my land so I don't care about it) and even though I don't ever see any problems with the widow I have learned from this situation to just have it done first so that I know and never have to worry about this situation again. Granted, there is always a chance of a boundry dispute when the survey is done but I don't see her being that way and I have no intentions of intruding onto her ground anyway. This parcel borders up to her vineyard anyway so its not like I can do too much without ripping out her grapes. Plus she is easy to talk with so I can discuss my ideas with her if what I am going to do may impact the boundry. But this lady currently has a huge pile of shale and multiple piles of compost and posts stored on this parcel. She has already offered me to use any shale I may need (I won't) but she is working on trying to spread the compost in her vineyard and will take care of the other items as she and the hired help have the time. I'm going to put a loading area there for during harvest so its not a big deal as her piles won't affect my plans any.

I don't know if the wife told the husband to not talk to me, doesn't really matter anyway. I just feel better knowing I didn't do anything wrong in how I approached that situation and that my thoughts on how rude and dangerous an act that was were confirmed by you guys. I'm moving on and see nothing but great things ahead for myself and my daughter :)
 
   / How would you handle this neighbor issue? #58  
who wants to argue with a guy open carrying.. Now I'm not saying open carrying is like the wild west but are you gonna start shooting grass clippings at a guy thats got a cannon on his hip.. sounds like a real chicken **** man if you ask me.. to coward to talk

We've had several situations through the years where a open carry or concealed sidearm you can "show" have been comforting........


Of course this is Arkansas where a gun is pretty much given to you by the state at birth....... the legal aspect of going armed on one's own property is nill compared to many states.
 
   / How would you handle this neighbor issue?
  • Thread Starter
#59  
We've had several situations through the years where a open carry or concealed sidearm you can "show" have been comforting........


Of course this is Arkansas where a gun is pretty much given to you by the state at birth....... the legal aspect of going armed on one's own property is nill compared to many states.

Yeah, here in NY we still are allowed to carry concealed but if someone accuses you of brandishing a weapon, well your guilty and in the papers on weapons related charges before you even know what happened. Its just not worth the potential problems. I enjoy shooting and if I am alone in the vineyard in an area where I might expect to encounter a coyote or other pest I will carry but if I am going to be around other people then I leave it locked in the safe.
 
   / How would you handle this neighbor issue? #60  
Yeah, here in NY we still are allowed to carry concealed but if someone accuses you of brandishing a weapon, well your guilty and in the papers on weapons related charges before you even know what happened. Its just not worth the potential problems. I enjoy shooting and if I am alone in the vineyard in an area where I might expect to encounter a coyote or other pest I will carry but if I am going to be around other people then I leave it locked in the safe.

Brandishing a weapon on your own land or business?


Basically impossible in Arkansas..... just don't point it at anybody.
 

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