In Minnesota, if you have a ditch with one evasive cattail growing in it, it is considered a wetland, a conservation delight that dictates all lawful uses of land, requires special provisions from unelected bureaucrats on-high, and carries the populist assumption that if messed with, all waterfowl, fisheries, and game refuges would suffer irreparable damage, thereby affecting the quality of life of all future generations of children. No, for the sake of the children, you cannot just build a road in Minnesota.
Now you could apply for a hardship variance, pay the $250 bucks only to have a retired teacher who somehow got on the Planning Commission not by competence, degree, or experience, but through nepotism, politely tell you to eff-off and your destructive capitalist plans unless it is explained, that after construction, the road shall be condemned to the state so that public access may be granted to bird watchers, who, unable to afford binoculars, will be able to gain access to the swamp and its rich ecosystem of swampish animals only by the provision of this proposed, wheelchair accessible drive which includes at least four parking spaces off of the right-of-way. Only then might you have a chance to build a road, but only if you promise to purchase through the Minnesota Conservation Fund an equal amount of wetlands that your driveway shall destroy that shall forever remain under the watchful eye and control of the MN DNR.
