Real Jay Leno type sign I found.

[N80]

XXXXXX XXXXXXXX XXXXXXXX
Is there any coffee?
XXXXXXXXXXX XXXXXXXXX XXXXXXXXX

Okay, that took me a second. Good one. And yes, we do have coffee but it tastes like......Shinola

 

[sandman2234]

And being from the south, it also might be sweet tea, if they had a "T", which is hard to find in other parts of the country! Wife drinks sweet tea and recently started traveling as part of her job. She informs me of the availability of sweet tea, as opposed to having to sweeten cold tea, which isn't the same.
I am more of a "Do you have grits" type of person when I walk into a resturant when I was out traveling.
David from jax

 

[KYErik]

This one is pretty good. Sometimes there's no place to go but up...

 

[Bird]

And being from the south, it also might be sweet tea

I've always heard people talk about only having sweet tea in the south when every restaurant I've ever been in either served the tea unsweetened (you could add your own sweetener) or they asked whether you wanted sweetened or unsweetened. The only restaurant I was ever in that did not have unsweetened tea was in western Canada.

 

[BTDT]

I ordered tea in Minnesota (St. Paul) one time and they brought it to me steaming in a cup. I told her, no thanks, I need iced tea.