Parents with dementia, how dealing with that has gone.

[tradosaurus]

Her brother who gave the keys back resides 14+ hours drive from them and not returning to help. If the dementia delusional dad kills someone or himself, what is the cost?

Sounds like her brother wants the father to die sooner than later

 

[ArlyA]

To add some pertinent info. The car is parked at the assisted living physicality they reside at. We'd like to have it away from there, and inside. If its there or even in his garage and not operable, he'd be calling whoever to have it repaired. We want it someplace else and in a locked building he doesn't know about. When we get it out of his fingers, we'd call the police department and tell them whats happening.

 

[Oaktree]

Just take the primary coil wire off.

I would take the rotor and pull a fuse…

My cars still have rotors except the newest…

What vintage cars do you guys drive? I don't think anything I've owned in the last 25-30 years (except for one antique) has had a distributor or old-school coil in it. All coil packs.

 

[Oaktree]

Since he has been driving his car across town and to his old house, he's been speaking with neighbors who have been helping him do things, we can't appreciate. If the car is in the garage he might ask them "I lost the garage key, can you help me get in?" and they break the door down for him. To eliminate this risk AND the chance his son will give him the keys back (again), we thought it might be prudent to remove the car from the premises to a garage they do not know of.

Tread carefully…

Agree about treading carefully.
I get what you're trying to do, but if only his name is on the title/registration then technically you're stealing it. If it were me, I'd seek legal advice on how to handle this.

 

[ultrarunner]

What vintage cars do you guys drive? I don't think anything I've owned in the last 25-30 years (except for one antique) has had a distributor or old-school coil in it. All coil packs.

I'm the opposite... more than 30 with rotors but my Model T's are coil packs... obviously ahead of their time...

 

[riptides]

Agree about treading carefully.
I get what you're trying to do, but if only his name is on the title/registration then technically you're stealing it. If it were me, I'd seek legal advice on how to handle this.

Power of attorney.

 

[ArlyA]

My spouse already has the power of attorney. We think he shouldn't be driving and the state of MN agrees and they took his license away. He is still driving so the safe thing to do is take his means away.

 

[WinterDeere]

To add some pertinent info. The car is parked at the assisted living physicality they reside at. We'd like to have it away from there, and inside. If its there or even in his garage and not operable, he'd be calling whoever to have it repaired. We want it someplace else and in a locked building he doesn't know about. When we get it out of his fingers, we'd call the police department and tell them whats happening.

I'm pretty sure there was a Dukes of Hazzard episode based on this synopsis. Maybe three.

 

[WinterDeere]

My spouse already has the power of attorney. We think he shouldn't be driving and the state of MN agrees and took his license away. He is still driving so the safe thing to do is take his means away.

Does PoA in MN give the authority to regulate driving privileges? I don't think that would fly, here. I think you need to get the state / DMV involved, on that.

 

[Topzide]

Does PoA in MN give the authority to regulate driving privileges? I don't think that would fly, here. I think you need to get the state / DMV involved, on that.

See post #287 above!
DMV took his license!

 

[Lgim]

Just a couple of questions/comments.
Is the nursing home where he lives / parks the car aware that the car is not insured and the gentleman who drives it is not licensed? Would they not be somewhat liable in the event of an accident? Would they tell you to get the car gone?
I think I read where the DMV had no way to revoke the license (physically take it away). If it were to fall out of his wallet and be lost it would they issue him a replacement?

gary

 

[tradosaurus]

Welp. Here we go. My wife’s mother goes into a retirement home two weeks ago. House and belongings still need to be resolved.
Wife’s older sister and husband decided to start removing stuff from house for their own. Supposedly got permission from aging mother.

 

[kenmbz]

Welp. Here we go. My wife’s mother goes into a retirement home two weeks ago. House and belongings still need to be resolved.
Wife’s older sister and husband decided to start removing stuff from house for their own. Supposedly got permission from aging mother.

Good luck with that. Hopefully it says peaceful..

 

[tradosaurus]

Good luck with that. Hopefully it says peaceful..

We’re 3 hrs away while her sister and husband are a mile from the house.
They aren’t hurting for money but want to make sure they can pick clean the things they want first.

Meanwhile I’m trying to get rid of more and more crap in my house.

My wife tried to see the good in people while I try to keep her grounded in reality.

Also her mother is a sheet stirrer. Loves the drama.
If i never go back there I won’t have any regrets.

 

[ArlyA]

Her mom was found to have advanced bladder cancer and now in hospice.

 

[Runner]

Her mom was found to have advanced bladder cancer and now in hospice.

Sorry to hear that.

 

[kenmbz]

Sorry to hear Arly, prayers sent

 

[MossRoad]

Her mom was found to have advanced bladder cancer and now in hospice.

Sorry to hear that as well.

 

[ArlyA]

Month-in-law fell and possibly broke her hip this afternoon... Not good.

 

[MossRoad]

Month-in-law fell and possibly broke her hip this afternoon... Not good.

Ooo, sorry to hear that. I've known several elderly people that did that and recovered, but also some that were not able to. It all depended on if they had the physical strength and will to go through rehab.