scuvnut said:
...all of these pale by comparison when trying to figure out women!
Reminds me of one of my all-time favoritie "stories"...
------------------------------------------------------
This old farmer had done a very brave and remarkable feat -- rescuing a whole school bus load of children from a bus that had overturned and then caught on fire in the field next to his house. The front, folding doors had been crushed and blocked when the bus overturned. The scared, panicked children couldn't get the emergency door in the back open, and they were trapped on the bus. The farmer ran over, managed to get one of the window exits open, and pulled child after child out of the overturned bus. He even talked two of the larger boys into pulling the unconscious driver back to the window, where he pulled them all out just before the bus was enveloped in flames...
Not only did this heroic act catch all the local media's attention, it also caught the attention of someone even more important. That night, while the old farmer was sleeping, God came to him in his dreams...
God said to the old farmer, "Because of your unselfish bravery, risking your own life and suffering cuts and burns to rescue all those poor, trapped children, I'll grant you any single wish that you can come up with. Just think it over very carefully, because you only get one wish..."
The farmer thought quietly for a few moments, then said, "God, will you build me a bridge to Hawaii? I've always wanted to go to Hawaii since I saw it on television years and years ago. I watch every National Geographic or travel special I can see about Hawaii. But, I'm scared to death of airplanes and ships make me deathly sick, so I can't even take a ship over there. But, if you'd build a bridge to Hawaii, I could drive over there and see Hawaii for myself..."
God replied, "Do you realize how difficult it would be to give you what you're asking for? It's thousands of miles to Hawaii, across some of the deepest parts of the Pacific Ocean, ans there's still active volcanoes on the ocean floor -- miles down there -- and the ocean floor keeps shifting all the time. Do you have another wish, that might be a little bit easier to accomplish?"
The farmer said, "Well, my second thought was -- could you help me understand women? I've never been able to, as hard as I've tried..."
To which God replied, "Do you want that to be a two-lane or a four-lane bridge?"
