Craigslist translator

[zzvyb6]

"Cash in hand" : I'll give you $1.00 for every $1000 of real value. And it will be in coins because that's all the money in my cup holders.

 

[PILOON]

This from a sellers perspective (me):
Potential buyer sets up appointment and calls back next day: I can't make it over to look at your dump truck Saturday, I have to work overtime.
Translation: Wife found out about it and said you have a dump truck and don't need a bigger one.

A gentleman! at least he called to cancel, most make you stay home all day waiting.

 

[caver]

A gentleman! at least he called to cancel, most make you stay home all day waiting.

I agree but was going to be there anyway doing some work.

 

[caver]

I thought of this old thread a few minutes ago seeing an ad on marketplace for a dozer:

Dozer, fires right up. The track is loose we don't have time to fix it. It will drive onto a trailer
Translation: Undercarriage is toast and we can't find parts. Better bring a winch with your trailer.

 

[sea2summit]

I just don’t use it anymore.

I wish I could still get it to work.

 

[BravoXray]

Called a guy that listed a '70 Nova for sale, pictures were really bad, and I asked him what kind of shape the body was in. He says "it's a good solid car a little rust in the rockers, but that's about all.
I drove 40 miles to look at it, and it was a total piece of junk, more holes rusted through every panel than you could count. Didn't look like it had been moved in 30 years. The engine was setting in the dirt, not covered, carb open to rain and one valve cover was off.

I just walked away and left before I called him an idiot for having wasted my time.

 

[JasperFrank]

Untested. ---- translation.. It doesn't work.

Collectable. ------- Brick-a-brack that didn't sell at the estate sale.

Rare. ---------- I'm charging 15% more than retail.

OBO. ----------- If you match the price I really expected to get out of the item.

Antique ........ Item looks to be at least 20 years old, yet its a reproduction anyway.

Gaming system. ----- ten year old computer with an added RGB fan.