Building a Shoe Barn

   / Building a Shoe Barn #51  
Statistically at least 75% of all divorces are INITIATED by the woman. The argument about men being physically abusive to their wives is few and far between because of the consequences and the fact that most men want a stable marriage and home life.

In a valid Christian marriage you are allowed to separate for just cause but have to realize that you are still married.

View attachment 647223

What source are you using for your statistic?

Most men want a stable marriage and home life??:laughing: Heck, one of my old bosses use to sleep around on his wife on company trips (it wasn't only apparent to me).

My wife would fall into your "statistic". My wife is a much better better Christian than myself BTW. My wife couldn't stand her ex husbands infidelity so they went to a marriage councilor per HER request, but after the first meeting, he (her ex husband) didn't feel like it was worth it even when she went by herself afterwards. Same ex husband, a apparent "successful" engineer, has been divorced at least 2 times since my wife divorced him (not certain on the chick he moved overseas with, but he's back in the states single again, living in a small town, my wife hears things).

Sincere question, what religious denomination do you belong to? (AKA what kind of church). In your mind, if you're still married to a former spouse, I'm assuming you can't get remarried "in the eyes of God". Or is my assumption incorrect?

The reality is the OP's wife has a thing for shoes. I don't understand it, but I really don't care one way or another because we all have our "weaknesses". Apparently you do have a problem with it as YOU would never allow your wife to have that many shoes. That said, you have absolutely no clue what impact those shoes have on their financial situation of the OP.

I don't forbid my wife to do anything because I understand she's a grown woman who has a mind of her own (added she knows the differrence between right and wrong).
 
   / Building a Shoe Barn #52  
What source are you using for your statistic?

Most men want a stable marriage and home life??:laughing: Heck, one of my old bosses use to sleep around on his wife on company trips (it wasn't only apparent to me).

My wife would fall into your "statistic". My wife is a much better better Christian than myself BTW. My wife couldn't stand her ex husbands infidelity so they went to a marriage councilor per HER request, but after the first meeting, he (her ex husband) didn't feel like it was worth it even when she went by herself afterwards. Same ex husband, a apparent "successful" engineer, has been divorced at least 2 times since my wife divorced him (not certain on the chick he moved overseas with, but he's back in the states single again, living in a small town, my wife hears things).

Sincere question, what religious denomination do you belong to? (AKA what kind of church). In your mind, if you're still married to a former spouse, I'm assuming you can't get remarried "in the eyes of God". Or is my assumption incorrect?

The reality is the OP's wife has a thing for shoes. I don't understand it, but I really don't care one way or another because we all have our "weaknesses". Apparently you do have a problem with it as YOU would never allow your wife to have that many shoes. That said, you have absolutely no clue what impact those shoes have on their financial situation of the OP.

I don't forbid my wife to do anything because I understand she's a grown woman who has a mind of her own (added she knows the differrence between right and wrong).

Women More Likely Than Men to Initiate Divorces, But Not Non-Marital Breakups | American Sociological Association
69% from this study in 2015 but I've heard from various sources that its much higher today.

Your 4 leaf clover finds are rare.

I'm a traditional Catholic. No birth control and marriage is for life.
 
   / Building a Shoe Barn #53  
Women More Likely Than Men to Initiate Divorces, But Not Non-Marital Breakups | American Sociological Association
69% from this study in 2015 but I've heard from various sources that its much higher today.

Your 4 leaf clover finds are rare.

I'm a traditional Catholic. No birth control and marriage is for life.

1 - The statistics you noted didn't mention why the divorce was initiated by the women. If they survey was from nothing but abused women, I would argue that the stats could be skewed without mentioning the survey example.

2 - Corrent me if I'm wrong, but hasn't the Catholic church remarried people who became divorced and re married in the same chuch? Or is it just a question of your social status and how much money you have? Could be wrong, but believe even the holier than popes have had children:laughing: So, if you don't believe in remarriage, how does your church condone it??

My wife is one of the better Christians I know. Shes come to understand that there is no black and white, but a lot of gray involved in life when it comes to social issues (her grandfather was a poor minister who served his church for over 40 years, not that it matters). I belive her grandfatther was married for 60 years, and he and his wife died within 30 days apart from each other, again, not that it matters. Point being my wife believe in marriage and being united for life, BUT, for what he ex husband put her through and what he wasn't willing to do to save their marriage, she left him and all the joint assetts, no questions asked, just to leave and get him out of her life.
 
   / Building a Shoe Barn #54  
My wife and I thought we might work on the bedroom of our house. I hesitate to call it the master bedroom because we are not sure if it is going to stay that way. We are working (slowly) on an inlaw apartment too, and so we might take that as a master bedroom when we are done...I am not sure.

But right now we have a 16 x 16 bedroom that is kind of goofy. It used to be a 16 x 12 bedroom when we had a hallway that went by it, then out a back door. But it looked like a hotel room walking down the hall. So we truncated the hallway where the doors led to the bedrooms on the left and right. Then we put in a 4 x 4 closet for stuff like board games, crafts, and that sort of thing. Then we took out a wall in our bedroom and made it a bit bigger by 4 x 8. But for a bedroom it looked goofy; we had an exterior door, and the room was U-shaped.

So my wife decided she wanted a shoe closet there instead. That will get rid of the exterior door, then take out another window so we can put a bed against that wall. Then take out the window that is left, and put in a big patio door instead.

This will give us two closets in that bedroom. The master closet that is 8 x 12 feet will be for my wife and I, then the new walk-in shoe closet that will be 4 x 8. We affectionaly call it the "Shoe Barn" :)

Down the road we might turn the bigger walk-in closet into another bathroom, or maybe not...we are not sure. That would make it a master bedroom suite, but with a tiny 4x8 walk-in closet. So anyway, today I framed up the new shoe closet just for something to do. So I will put the cogeneration set on hold, and work on this for awhile. A Trophy-Husband has to prioritize, heat and electricity for his humble abode, or a place for the Mrs. to put all her shoes!

View attachment 644389

Smart man.
 
   / Building a Shoe Barn
  • Thread Starter
#55  
There is a difference IMO between going broke buying crap you don't need and having the money and buying what you like which doesn't negatively impact your financial conditions.

My wife does not drink, smoke or has ever done drugs, yet takes care of our four daughters, is a farm wife, and even a nurse on weekends. If having excess shoes is her only vice, I will gladly put up with it.

Part of that too is, we are farmers, and so when we do go out, we like to shrug off the denim overalls, and a-shuck-of-straw-stuck-between-our-teeth image that most people have of farmers, and look presentable. When we are asked what we do for work, people are stunned that we are farmers because we are often the best dressed people in the place. Again, my wife likes to be fashionable, and so there are far worse vices a wife could have.

But that is the ironic thing; Tradosaurus makes the case for marriage is for life, but when you love someone, isn't that what you do; love them despite some faults?

You do not make them try to be what you want them to be, you love the person that God made, and has allowed in your life.

But hypocrisy is not a Christian thing, it is a human thing.

Here is a news flash: I married a sinner, but Katie married an even bigger one, so whom am I to judge?

 
   / Building a Shoe Barn
  • Thread Starter
#56  
The patio door was supposed to come last week, but since it never arrived, I assumed the window factor had shut down due to Black Swan, but yesterday the truck showed up with it. I had some other things to do, so I could not get much done with it, but it should be in today, and between today and tomorrow, I should have this bedroom project wrapped up.

After that, it will be putting in a double-vanity in our main bathroom for our daughters (we have four, ages 6, 13,14 and 15).

Then after that, onto the inlaw apartment I started, but have not yet finished.
 
   / Building a Shoe Barn #57  
My wife does not drink, smoke or has ever done drugs, yet takes care of our four daughters, is a farm wife, and even a nurse on weekends. If having excess shoes is her only vice, I will gladly put up with it.

Part of that too is, we are farmers, and so when we do go out, we like to shrug off the denim overalls, and a-shuck-of-straw-stuck-between-our-teeth image that most people have of farmers, and look presentable. When we are asked what we do for work, people are stunned that we are farmers because we are often the best dressed people in the place. Again, my wife likes to be fashionable, and so there are far worse vices a wife could have.

But that is the ironic thing; Tradosaurus makes the case for marriage is for life, but when you love someone, isn't that what you do; love them despite some faults?

You do not make them try to be what you want them to be, you love the person that God made, and has allowed in your life.

But hypocrisy is not a Christian thing, it is a human thing.

Here is a news flash: I married a sinner, but Katie married an even bigger one, so whom am I to judge?


Well said. Kind of sad that a fun thread on your build has turned into a whine fest about personal issues that have nothing to do with carpentry and country living.
 
   / Building a Shoe Barn
  • Thread Starter
#58  
Well said. Kind of sad that a fun thread on your build has turned into a whine fest about personal issues that have nothing to do with carpentry and country living.

Oh that does not bother me. I learned a long time ago that for the most part, people just want to be heard.

I got a wife and four daughters, so it is impossible for me to get a word in edgewise...pushed by a bulldozer.

If I had a wife and nine kids, I would want someone to listen to me too!
 
   / Building a Shoe Barn #59  
Oh that does not bother me. I learned a long time ago that for the most part, people just want to be heard.

I got a wife and four daughters, so it is impossible for me to get a word in edgewise...pushed by a bulldozer.

If I had a wife and nine kids, I would want someone to listen to me too!

Don't worry about me. My wife and I talk all the time and my adult kids are well spoken and mannered.

Just remember that If Daddy ain't happy, no one's happy! :laughing:
 
   / Building a Shoe Barn
  • Thread Starter
#60  
Well I finally got this project finished. It took a couple of days to get the door in, the drywall placed and mudded in, then paint and all the trim. That included an outside light over the new patio door. But it is done, with the exception of some new flooring for the "His Closet", and this is the results.

As for details, at the moment anyway, it is a Master Bedroom with his and her walk-in closets, his being 4x9 and hers being 8 x 12. The bedroom itself is 16 x 12 not including any closet space.

Since the last update, I built (2) matching barn-wood bedside tables, my wife bought matching lamps, and then we installed two lights over the headboard for reading. I then installed the patio door to give the room some light.

Total cost was:
Custom Made Door: $900
Framing Lumber: $327
Lamps: $60
Hardware: 250
Total: $1537

(This is a photo looking over the bedroom from His Closet door, to the door of Her Closet).



(This is the same view as before, but with the new patio door installed).



(This is the Her Closet).



(This is the His Closet)

 

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