Need advice regarding a "city boy" coming to rural property

[Jstpssng]

What seems like work to you may be fun for someone who has never done it before. Look at how many people raise backyard chickens...

 

[Panik]

I would really hesitate on any sharp, spinning equipment. Accidents WILL happen before anybody can stop them.

My son, and a friend of his, come out and help me with one of my major projects. Thinning my pine stands.

The steps - identify the trees - fell the trees - drag to several central piles - chip the trees. I thin 800 to 1200 small pines - every couple years.

Son and friend are both in their mid-40's. I will do the first two steps. The two guys will do step three and four. Step four - obviously the most fun. They get to drive my tractor and use the big 'ol Wallenstein chipper.

I trust nobody else with one of my chainsaws. It can happen all so fast and it's a 45 minute drive to the nearest medical help.

^ This... I've got a 15 year old (very soon to be 16... as in we just got lucky and fell into a used outback for him).

For the last two years he's been mowing our yard/field with a zero turn and helping me by dragging tree/brush trimmings with our BX. This has softened ever so slightly to include very light loader-brush transport, but until very very recently I drew a hard line with any kind of loader work.

While I don't post here often, I know a fair bit of people would likely disagree with my wife's and my decision about teaching him to use a mower and tractor at 13. It's a very fair and reasonably argument, to which I will say that such decisions are very very highly situational.....

I strongly feel developing good operational skills and situational awareness using yard equipment can be be huge plus in the progression towards operating a vehicle on the road. It's unfortunate that my 13 year old middle may not have the same opportunities due to differences in his level of focus, decision making skills and attention to detail.

In any event and to your point about your friends' involvement sharp, spinning tools (and yes, I'm aware of the inherent contradiction with mowers) ....My oldest has an interest in building his skillset in using tools and over the last couple years has come to me occasionally asking about if I'll ever teach him to use a chainsaw.

My answer to that has and will remain the same - NO. There's not enough need on our 11 acres for him to assume the risk & while I'm experienced enough to handle trimming/bucking/simple felling on our property, I don't consider myself skilled enough to function as good instructor to teach someone how to handle a chainsaw. I have however done my best to try impart a realistic understanding of how serious and dangerous operating a chainsaw can be. And if he ever needs to learn saw skills I know enough people who are very good instructors who can do right by him.

I would guess that my position about saws is biased based on my experiences... I've worked as a partner seasonally in prescribed fire with the Forest Service, The Nature Conservancy and state DNR and have seen way more dumb stuff from trained and supposedly skilled sawyers than I would like.... to the point that I hav refused to become certified to operate a saw on burns.

 

[bigtiller]

What seems like work to you may be fun for someone who has never done it before. Look at how many people raise backyard chickens...

That's what I've been thinking too. There were a lot of things on the farm to do that were fun the first time I did them. Like...
gather eggs
catch a chicken
dress a chicken
clean animal stalls
repair a fence
curry comb a horse
wrestle with a girl in the haymow

 

[Larry Caldwell]

Shooting some targets or good ole fashion cans. Riding horses. Or off roading in anything. Fishing. Watching wildlife. Driving a truck or tractor.
The list goes on

My 15 year old nephew stayed with me for gun safety training. I checked him out on muzzle control, cleaning, how to clear the action, keeping finger off the trigger, etc. We started with a ramset blank in a .22 revolver blowing holes in cardboard, and ended up with a 9mm and a .357, plus an assortment of rifles and shotguns. By the end of a week I was reasonably confident he was not going to accidentally shoot himself or someone else. By chance, a round hung in the tubular magazine of a .22. You should have seen the look on his face when he ejected a live round from a rifle he thought was empty. He also learned to eject the round from the chamber after he dropped the magazine of the 9mm.

I let him get a few hours of tractor time, which he loved, and thumped him pretty hard for getting too close to a cut bank. Way more farmers have died from tractors than guns.

Another time we went on a hiking trip. I taught him orienteering with map and lensatic compass, including giving him a decent compass. Any more that's just for when the GPS battery goes dead, but a useful skill. There are other tricks, like how to start a fire with a couple sticks and a shoelace and how to blaze a trail if he is lost and searchers may be looking for him. How to make and bait a figure 4 snare.

Simple self-preservation skills are important. This is a kid who had two broken collarbones before I harassed his parents into signing him up for judo to learn how to fall without hurting himself.

 

[Jstpssng]

That's what I've been thinking too. There were a lot of things on the farm to do that were fun the first time I did them. Like...
gather eggs
catch a chicken
dress a chicken
clean animal stalls
repair a fence
curry comb a horse
wrestle with a girl in the haymow

I'm thinking that at least one of those will never get old.

 

[CliffordK]

I don't believe in bubble wrapping the world for kids. Although what one does with one's own kids may be different from what one does with other relatives or neighbor kids.

The Jr High and High School years are very formative years, and lessons can stay with a person for the rest of their lives. Then they get thrown out into the "real world".

We built my parent's house when I was about 13. I helped a lot, and got to use all the saws, measuring tapes, sharp knives, and also did a lot of electrical work. Those lessons have kept with me for the rest of my life.

It is sad to see people in their 20's or 30's that can't read a measuring tape, can't use simple tools.

After building the house, we decided to plow the front pasture... and yep, I got in quite a bit of tractor time pulling the two bottom plow around the pasture.

Teach safety young, and it may be a better lesson than to ignore it during childhood and hope they will learn the safety rules as young adults.

 

[Yander]

I put my nephew in a barn infested with rats with a Stephens crackshot 22 short. He was probably 14.

 

[plowhog]

a .22 revolver blowing holes in cardboard

It would be beneficial to educate him about gun safety. His father has a couple of semi-auto rifles and I don't think he engages the care around firearms that I do. And one of my family members is a certified armorer for Glock handguns.

But, as Ponytug wisely wrote, I need to know a lot more, and observe a lot more, before making any decisions especially hauling out any firearms. But I will keep it on the list of possibilities.

 

[Fuddyduddy1952]

Oh crap uncle!
Introduce him to the neighbors country daughter

^^^^^^

 

[Jstpssng]

The Nature Conservancy and state DNR and have seen way more dumb stuff from trained and supposedly skilled sawyers than I would like

To me, the most dangerous times with a saw is when you are tired, and when you have used one just long enough to think you know more than the saw does.

I have a scar on my kneecap to remind me of the latter.

 

[Jstpssng]

Teach safety young, and it may be a better lesson than to ignore it during childhood and hope they will learn the safety rules as young adults

Too many people don't realize this. My driver's ed instructor told us they'd found the best drivers were those who were allowed to ride their tricycles indoors.

 

[California]

We built my parent's house when I was about 13. I helped a lot, and got to use all the saws, measuring tapes, sharp knives, and also did a lot of electrical work. Those lessons have kept with me for the rest of my life.

Same. I look around this old farmhouse and still see repair stuff that I did 60~70 years ago.

Much of it still in use but there are a few things that are obvious kid workmanship, such as where I painted over a shelf-paper thumbtack instead of pulling it, out of sheer rebellion. And the 3-wire outlets that are wired properly but mounted upside down because I didn't have any examples to learn the customary way and Dad said do what you want. (Everything existing was 2-wire no ground).

 

[CliffordK]

And the 3-wire outlets that are wired properly but mounted upside down because I didn't have any examples to learn the customary way and Dad said do what you want.

Is there a standard?

Anyway, for the electrical work, we had a former neighbor who was a licensed electrician that would come and moonlight once a week or so to get us organized. Then we'd follow his lead.

 

[CliffordK]

It would be beneficial to educate him about gun safety. His father has a couple of semi-auto rifles and I don't think he engages the care around firearms that I do. And one of my family members is a certified armorer for Glock handguns.

But, as Ponytug wisely wrote, I need to know a lot more, and observe a lot more, before making any decisions especially hauling out any firearms. But I will keep it on the list of possibilities.

Talk to the parents and other family members.

I'd much rather someone that knows what they're doing (I presume) teach kids about firearms than having them go out and shoot road signs and mailboxes with a bunch of other teenagers.

However, don't give guns to kids that already have anger issues, or other troublesome social problems (although it can never hurt to just talk to the kid some too).

 

[California]

for the electrical work, we had a former neighbor who was a licensed electrician that would come and moonlight ... Then we'd follow his lead.

My only guide was the Richter wiring book. Long before Sunset issued better guides.

 

[plowhog]

Talk to the parents

Since he is 15 and coming from out of state, I need to have a number of discussions to learn and comply with the parent's wishes. And legal requirements. And I will comply with all.

What makes it interesting is the parents are divorced and the acrimony reigns supreme. One is awaiting a court date right now to wrest custody away from the other due to "domestic violence." This has persisted for years.

I stay well clear of such drama. Just one text received usually includes more personal drama than exists in my household for 5-10 years. So, I tiptoe cautiously. But even in light of that, I am looking forward to a good visit and exposing a young man to positive things he has never experienced.

My sister said he needs a good male role model right now. I'm not sure I am totally up to that, but I do believe I can be a lot better example than what he has in his life right now.

 

[plowhog]

I look around this old farmhouse and still see repair stuff that I did 60~70 years ago.

I opened up an electrical box at my 100+ year old farmhouse a few months ago.

It had 4 green wires, one white wire, and a black wire, all connected together and cinched with a wire nut. Ahhhhh ... I think I will leave that one alone!

 

[paulsharvey]

I put my nephew in a barn infested with rats with a Stephens crackshot 22 short. He was probably 14.

I was sent under a single wide to rat hunt with a 22lr revolver and rat shot, at the age of 9.

 

[Fuddyduddy1952]

My nephew would stay with my parents for a week or so when he was about 15 years ago.
Parents would have breakfast at 8am then Dad would say "well...let's get to work!".
Each day Dad had projects to do, everything you could imagine and they would work all day, stopping for lunch & quit for supper.
Dad passed 10 years ago and I saw my nephew last week and joked about it. He didn't laugh, except said "you know I learned a whole lot doing all those chores, things I can now do myself".

 

[paulsharvey]

I dont know how sheltered, or domesticated this kid is, but. When son was in cub scouts, I remember going on the first camping trip, and being dumbfounded by some of these 1st/2nd grade kids; one had a snotty nose, and asked if anyone had tissues. No, just do a farmers blow. He had no idea what that was. Just being able to run around a bit feral and pee in the woods, I think many of us take for granted.

My advice would be, don't over do it, or force too much. It might annoy you, but if he's propped up by the campfire, half paying attention, and half on his phone, that's a win. Forcing a kid to sit in a boat fishing from 4am-9pm, whether you catch anything or not, hungry, bored, and sunburnt, probably isn't gonna win you any favors. At the same time, he might need a bit of a push, and thats OK too, just don't keep pushing.