Will be a Dad soon...need tips from Dads...

[scesnick]

I have two little girls, 4&5 years old. I would say GET SOME SLEEP NOW !!! because it will be a while before you get 8 hours again.
I agree with the pacifier idea. But both my girls only had them when they were infants. Get a "Diaper Genie " they are a thing to put the smelly diapers and they work well.

Not sure what your wifes preference is and it is a personal choice but studies have shown that breast feeding is better for the child, less sick time and long term studies also show better brain activity in scholl bellieve it or not. ( not to mention it is ALOT easier on the wallet. Forumla is VERY expensive.

Get a book about being a first time dad. it helped me out.

 

[RollTideRam]

The biggest change to me, was my marriage. We had our son three months shy of our 15th anniversary. I was kind of set in my ways and used to the way things were. It took alot of adjustment for both of us. Even after only 1 hour of sleep last night because he was sick, and working 12 hours of overtime today, I would not trade anything in the world for my boy or my wife. Also watch out what you do in front of them, my boy wants to be just like me, good and bad. JC

 

[Farmwithjunk]

I would say GET SOME SLEEP NOW !!! because it will be a while before you get 8 hours again.

Amen to that. You'll get a good night's sleep again sometime after they turn 30. (maybe) There's a lot of work ahead. Forget about having much free time. And don't even consider the possibility of having expendable cash.

But, CONGRATULATIONS! You're about to find out what life is all about! And someday, she'll hand you a grandchild. Then it's even better.

 

[BTDT]

Never say no when you can possibly say yes. I am reminded of the song "Cats in the cradle", time just slips away.

The last part of a poem I like goes like this:

As we train our children in the way they should go,
let us realize and come to know,
we don't have guarantee's when they're not in our care,
we just get down on our knee's and offer our prayer.

 

[dmccarty]

-One of the best tips I've heard so far is to NOT heat the baby's formula...if you break them in drinking it at room temp., you'll never have to heat it for them.

-No matter what the urge, resist the action of picking up baby every time she cries. It kind of boils down to the "Pavlov's Dog" theory.

Both of these are wrong. Its not a big deal to heat up the milk in the microwave. You have to figure out the right time, I think ours was 5 seconds, for a full bottle. And then test it. Not hard. Does not take time. The establishment will tell you not to heat the bottle in the microwave because you might burn the baby. Duh! I can make the bottle to hot in a water bath as well.

If the baby cries, pick it up! Its a baby. It wants to be touched and reassured. Pick the kid up. Some day you won't be able to do it so pick and hold them when you can. A crying child is a different story. You know when the crying is for real and a put on.

Get sleep now.

Keep ear protection handy. Our first kid had one colicy moment at 2:00am. My parents happened to be visiting and nobody was sleeping. A baby that is crying and wont stop is very irritating. I think this leads to lots of infant abuse. When you have tried everything to get the baby to stop crying, bottle, milk, water, diaper, holding, rocking, etc and the baby is still crying you have a problem. Its annoying to say the least. You are very tired and you have the noise maker that is driving you nuts. What do you do?

Put on you ear protection. Then its not as annoying anymore. When our daughter did this I just happened to have some ear protection laying around. I put them out and things where much better. Our second child did not do this but some kids are colicy quite a bit.

Breast feed if possible. We spent a fortune on baby fomula. The powder mix is cheaper, it helps to warm up the water before mixing. Premixed is very expensive.

Child care. If you both have to work start looking for a place to take care of the baby. Its expensive. Baby's ain't cheap. Quality child care, much less infant care, is very expensive and can be hard to find. Get on the list now.

We had a diaper genie and it did not work for us for some reason. Sure seemed like it would but it was just easier to toss the diaper in the garbage. No matter how you get rid of the used diapers, diapers are expensive. Look for sales and buy a lot. We ended up using the name brands. The off brands would have more problems like leaks and busting open.

You are a parent when you can cup your hands to hold baby puke to keep it from getting on the couch.

Poo and puke just ain't that big a deal anymore.... Its what kids do. Parents clean up.

Congrats.

Kids are alot of fun, alot of work and they cost a fortune. But they are worth every cent.

Later,
Dan

 

[BTDT]

I always thought it kind of strange that guys will go out and drain oil, get oil and grease all over them, dirt from crawling around under machines, etc., then come in and the wife wants you to change a diaper, and your like "Oooh, that's nasty!".

 

[dooleysm]

We just had our second boy about 6 weeks ago. The first is 21 months.

We have a bottle warmer that you fill with water and put the bottle in to warm it up. It works pretty quick, except when the baby is crying at 2 AM. Both of our boys much preferred warm formula at first, but the older the get, the less picky they are and they'll gladly drink whatever tempurature formula you give them.

We have a diaper genie but I don't know how well it works. When it starts getting full, it still stinks when you open it to put a diaper in, so I'm not sure that it's worth the time/effort/money. That said, we haven't tried going without, so I don't know.

The first one was a breeze. The wife was happy to wake up and feed him and he was sleeping through the night pretty well by 2 months. The new one is not nearly as content. Also, the older one has been a bear lately, waking up in the middle of the night and not wanting to go back to sleep. Last night was awful. The baby was mad all night long and the wife was up with him. The older one woke up around 2 and just cried for about 2 hours for no apparent reason. It's going to be a long day. And the day is not the worst part. The worst will be tonight when me and the wife are dead to the world and the kids are both still awake at 9, 9:30, 10, etc. That's when it's hard.

But, as other's have said, when I get home from work and my older boy yells, DADDY! and comes running, it's all worth it. From talking to my friends that are dads, it seems like all the guys don't really care much for the babies like the women do, it's once they start talking and taking and moving around on their own when it gets good for the dads.

Congratulations, and best of luck to you.

 

[hazmat]

Mossroad metioned it already, but I'll reiterate.

All kids are different, you need to find what works for yours. Everyone will tell you how to do it, which implies that if you aren't doing it that way, you are wrong. Depending on the self confidence level of your wife and other personalities (usually grandmas and aunts) this can be very intimidating and cause much stress for your family. My wife (not the most confident person) often says, that "so and so thinks I'm a horrible mother". I think she does a stand up job & our daughter is healthy & well behaved (though the terrible twos are coming out a bit ).

Our biggest frustration is that our daughter is a picky eater (and is only 23# at 2 years old). Ocasionally you need to "break the rules" - Ie the kid hasn't had a decent meal in 3 days, so you let her eat in your lap vs. in her chair.

So, listen to all the advice, try different things & figure out what works for you.

Oh & as Dan said, you do give attention to a crying infant, that's why they are crying. Once they are a bit older, you will be able to tell when it's a show.

That said, I've known plenty of kids who need to cry themselves to sleep (for a few minutes) - in addition to a call for attention, it is a coping mechanism that actually sooths the baby (especially if they are overstimulated) by blocking out the world. See - you need to figure out how your kid works.

Oh and don't forget to teach her about tractors & such. It is a blast to walk into the garage & hear "orange tractor"

 

[hazmat]

...But, as other's have said, when I get home from work and my older boy yells, DADDY! and comes running, it's all worth it. From talking to my friends that are dads, it seems like all the guys don't really care much for the babies like the women do, it's once they start talking and taking and moving around on their own when it gets good for the dads.

Congratulations, and best of luck to you.

I've found that I've enjoyed my daughter much more since about a year old. Call me selfish, but it was a bit "boring" hanging out with an infant, who didn't really interact with you.

 

[Farmwithjunk]

I always thought it kind of strange that guys will go out and drain oil, get oil and grease all over them, dirt from crawling around under machines, etc., then come in and the wife wants you to change a diaper, and your like "Oooh, that's nasty!".

We're talkin old oil vs. baby......uh......WOW! I'm glad my kids are grown.