Why I am blessed

[Sigarms]

My father in 2007 at around age 76.


My mother had passed away 5 years earlier. Dad was driving a pontiac sunfire with over 100k on it and it was looking beat. I'll never forget trying to talk him into buying a new car when he he came to visit, and when we pulled onto the dealers lot, I asked him how much he wanted to spend. He told me no more than $13,000! I asked him how much he could afford and he told me "anything he wants" LOL

11 years later and on his 3rd brand new car



When he came down to visit the other week, I told him I found the last of 3 V6 honda accord coupes available in NC. When we went to the dealer, he had his check book, title and extra set of keys.

My father lives modestly, didn't get above E-6 after he was busted rank serving 20 plus years (long story, not politically correct). Retired from two other jobs when he got out after plus 20 years, and the kicker is, he has more hair on his head than I do and he doesn't need reading glasses like I do!

I was lucky. He has a flip phone, I called the provider, and I was able to sync his flip phone with the blue tooth in the car and you should see the smile on his face when he realized he can talk in the car by pushing a button and not even touch the steering wheel,

I got the short end of the stick if you ask me per hair and eye sight LOL

We always post something AFTER our fathers are gone. Mines still here, and I think he's the best.

I can only hope my two boys think the same of me. Sometimes I worry because I think I'm too hard on them at times.

That said, I still remember my dad telling me (after I was in trouble) "you can take it two ways, one, like a man and stand and take it there, or two, run around like a chicken with your head cut off, but you're still going to get it". He gave it to me, but I still love him.

Couple years ago I still remember him telling me after coming back from Charleston SC after a golfing trip with his buddies "no way in **** am I ever going to do two rounds again in the same day"

The best a parent can hope for is their kids love them when they grow up IMO. My dad succeeded.

 

[mark02tj]

You truly are a lucky man, Sigarms!!

I wish my dad was in half as good of shape as yours. It's been a year (to the week) since my dad has been able to do anything close to what resembles walking. He went into the hospital last year at this time after he wasn't able to get up out of his chair. He's basically been in bed ever since.

Enjoy your time with your dad!!

 

[Wakey]

Nice read!

 

[The Deerslayer]

Great story, thanks for sharing. Made my day.

 

[Old Red]

He's 87? Nice! Tell him to stop spending your inheritance!!! LOL just joking...My parents used to joke around like that saying they were spending our money...... they are both gone....lost them too early.....but I guess it is always too early....enjoy your pops....glad he's still in great shape!

 

[MossRoad]

Nice! Wish my pops was still around. Got some great memories though. :thumbsup:

 

[Gary Fowler]

My Dad passed way too young. I am 68 and now have lived 1 year more than he did. I worked far from home most of my adult life and only got to go to visit my parents maybe twice a year. I was in Venezuela when he died just a week after I got down there. Due to his untimely death from a heart attack on a Friday, I was unable to get a clearance from the Venezuelan government to leave the country till Monday and first flight out was Tuesday so I wasn't able to get back for the funeral.

I feel fortunate to have spent about a month with him just a week before he died while waiting for a visa to go to work. That was likely more time than I had spent with him in the last 20 years if I combined all the trips home. At least I got back in time to be of comfort to Mom. One never knows how much time he has left of this earth.

 

[George2615]

Yes, you are blessed to have one or both parents still around. I miss mine very much as they both passed way too early as far as I'm concerned. Mom passed in 1978 (at age 52, was born in 1926), Dad passed in 1990 (age 67, born in 1923). Mom passed in her sleep from a cerebral hemorrhage and Dad had a stroke in 1985 (at 62) and couldn't speak and lost use of right arm. Since he couldn't talk he had his phone shut off. He had excellent insurance and in the beginning had daily nurse visits to help him, bathe him, shop for him, feed him etc.

He was very stubborn and determined and got well enough that his doctor allowed him to drive again. Once he got his wheels back he stopped the nurse visits and did all the stuff himself. Still couldn't talk but could get around. I lived out of state so only got to see him when I had a long weekend or went on vacation a couple times a year.

So to all members who still have your parents cherish the moments you have because they can be gone in an instant. I'm in the same boat with my kids. They live out of state and I only see them maybe once or twice a year but at least I can talk to them.

 

[Liquidsilver]

That's great. My mom and dad both passed in 2010 and I still mess the heck out 'em. Blessed indeed.

 

[freedomlives]

Wow, that's great with your dad.

Now-a-days, keeping up driving is pretty essential. I remember my grandfather had his license taken from him by my family when he was in his, I guess, mid-80s. Things started to go downhill with him after that-- maybe they would have anyway, but I always felt like he just ended up sitting around the house a lot more whereas before he was often out at the golf club with his friends.

My grandmother, OTOH, stopped driving after she had a blackout at age 91 or 92. She's now 100, though very frail.

 

[MossRoad]

I recently told my mother-in-law that I've known them about 5 years longer than I knew my own parents. She found that hard to believe. So we did the math... I started dating their daughter when I was 18. I've known them for 39 years. My mom died when I was 27 and my dad when I was 34. She couldn't believe they've been gone that long. They got along very well with my parents and were a big comfort to me when both my folks passed away. Now they're starting to wind down. Mom is 77ish. Dad is 90. He's starting to get dementia signs just the last few months. Hard to watch. We'll take care of him.

 

[Sigarms]

I recently told my mother-in-law that I've known them about 5 years longer than I knew my own parents. She found that hard to believe. So we did the math... I started dating their daughter when I was 18. I've known them for 39 years. My mom died when I was 27 and my dad when I was 34. She couldn't believe they've been gone that long. They got along very well with my parents and were a big comfort to me when both my folks passed away. Now they're starting to wind down. Mom is 77ish. Dad is 90. He's starting to get dementia signs just the last few months. Hard to watch. We'll take care of him.

Didn't get married until my late 30's. One thing I learned dating is that you don't only marry the woman, but her family. Like yourself, I've been lucky on that end. My wife had to remind me that they spent 8 months living in our house when they sold their house in Vermont and were looking for a place in NC. My mother in law is more like a mom to me. Won't lie, some members of her family can drive me up the wall LOL, but when it comes to my in laws, more like parents to me than anything else.

Came across this one of my father when he was in his late 40's early 40's. He knows how to have a good time LOL What really bugs me and perplexes me is I'm his age now, have more gray than than anything else in my beard, and have a whole lot less hair than he did when we're about the same age. He's 5'2 at best, I'm pushing 6', and my mom always joked that I was the mailman's son. Go figure.

 

[MossRoad]

My dad was bald. His dad was bald. His grandpa was bald. All the men on my mom's side were bald... I realized I was gonna be bald when I was about 8 years old. So I rarely cut my hair just so I could enjoy it because I knew it would be gone someday. In high school, it was almost to my belt. hahaha It started going right around the time we got married, so I still have hair in our wedding pictures. My wife knew what she was getting as far as husband material goes well before that. :laughing:

 

[PILOON]

LOL, I'll be 80 and have most of my hair and it is just showing some grey.
Dad passed at 86, and Mom passed at 98.
Other than her last year she lived alone.
My wife's parents also lived long with one uncle making it to 102.
We have 2 children and they have known all their great grand parents.
Personally while I have slowed considerably the only medical hick is a mild blood pressure controlled problem.
My wife's health is also very good.

LOL, we plan to live forever and so far so good.

 

[goeduck]

LOL, we plan to live forever and so far so good.

That is a good plan to have :drink:

 

[Sigarms]

My dad was bald. His dad was bald. His grandpa was bald. All the men on my mom's side were bald... I realized I was gonna be bald when I was about 8 years old. So I rarely cut my hair just so I could enjoy it because I knew it would be gone someday. In high school, it was almost to my belt. hahaha It started going right around the time we got married, so I still have hair in our wedding pictures. My wife knew what she was getting as far as husband material goes well before that. :laughing:

My dad was one of 10, and he was the baby, and as he jokes, the runt of the family. I do have to note that out of his four brothers, pretty much all of them after age 60 went bald. Mine didn't start going until about age 45. For wedding pics, I figured I'd only get married once and only have those "one time pics" taken, so before and during service I kept my beard. After the church service and before the family pics at the church, I shaved. Have pics of me at the wedding with both beard and clean shaven. My wife knew I was weird like that before she married me.

 

[MossRoad]

I was sporting a big Hungarian handlebar mustache at the time of my wedding. My wife had big 1980's hair. We were both smiling from ear-to-ear in those pictures. We invited 500 people to the wedding. Sat for 360. There were maybe 5 empty seats when dinner started. As I recall, we hired 4 cops, 4 bartenders, a Polka band (friends of ours from high school). We went through 4 gallons of wine (and that was just the head table), several kegs of beer, 56 bottles of hard liquor, 1100 plastic shot glasses.... My parents and her parents had a great time. My dad's mom was still alive, so I got to dance with my last remaining grandparent. It was quite the good time, with memories of both our sets of parents enjoying and celebrating.... best wedding I ever attended.

 

[kthompson]

You are blessed. I have lived seven year more than my dad who passed when I was 16, that was 47 years ago. My mom passed 11 years ago at 87. My father in law passed in 2000 and was as has been told already in my life longer than my Dad was and a great friend. My mother in law is now in long term care for three years with a son who has not acted as a son for many years and a daughter who does not care about her mother either only what is she getting and when. My father in law and mother is law are great people and loved me and me them Miss each one who has passed and know one day will join them in Heaven, my Mom, my father in law and when the time comes my mother in law. Wish I was sure about my Dad. His standing with God I wonder about.

A song that speaks to this topic is "the cat is in the cradle with a silver spoon". Listen to it carefully but the most important than you can do is tell your dad how you fell about him, share your post. I know this dad loves nothing more than one of my girls to say to me, I love you. They know me and still they love me.WOW

 

[Sigarms]

Wish I was sure about my Dad. His standing with God I wonder about.

The way I see it, if you love him, he will be where you're at when it's your time, as well as those others you love.

I can't speak for God, but the fact is none of us can.

Harry Chapin's song also always gets to me. My wife will tell you we're (my father and I) two peas in a pod. One reason why we can never work together as we'd kill each other LOL I still remember changing a tire with my dad and him chasing me around the car with the tire iron when I was a teenager.

Taking my dad to work tomorrow up to Tennesse to have lunch with a customer. Customer has met him before, thinks he's pretty cool. Another reason why I'm blessed. Customers are more than just customers to me.

 

[rox]

Sigarms I was thinking about how long your dad has lived alone since your mother died. When me and my husband go, I hope we are like those couples who die close together in time. I see how my mother lived after my father died and it was sad. She was not whiny, but it was so obvious how she didn't like living without him. They did everything together their whole lives, their marriage really was a true partnership. We are at the age where we start to wonder what our life will be like even 15 years from now, how will our health be, will we still be independent and financially secure. I'm less worried about the money, I think we are gonna be okay there, but your health.

I had my right hip replaced 3 years ago and I had really suffered with it for 3 years prior and now my left hip is going. It's a bad sign when you wake up in the morning and as soon as you get out of bed your hip hurts. It shouldn't start hurting until you have been up and walking around a while. Last night & today my husband has a pain on his right side, he was up since 4am. Because of the holiday no getting to the doctor until Tuesday. I guessed he might have gallstones so I looked up home remedies on the internet and he is taking apple cider vinegar and also peppermit oil, we figured that is not going to kill him if it isn't gallstones. I hope he is better tomorrow.