Sad Morning....Please Help!

Currmudgeon · Nov 14, 2003

Please accept my belated condolences. It's hard to lose an old friend. Harder still, when they go before theor normal time.

Sadly, losing pets is part of the price of having them. The joy they brought us makes it worth the price, but that's not much consolation at the time.

Try to remember the good times.

Give your kids a hug from me.

kevincook · Nov 15, 2003

Good evening everyone.

It is amazing how empty the house feels without Belle. I find myself almost calling Belle's name everytime I walk in the door or am leaving the house. There is noone there to greet you when you get home from work /forums/images/graemlins/frown.gif . Belle used to come with us everywhere.

The kids are going OK, I'm glad people here suggested to let the kids decide if they wanted to say goodbye. The kids wanted to and I think it made a big difference. My wife is having the hardest time of all. I couldn't even get her to eat anything until yesterday when here friends at work didn't give her a choice and sent out for lunch. Thank God for good friends. She wants another dog soon but I'm not sure how long we should wait until we get another Golden. I could really use some advice regarding that. My wife had dogs here whole life growing up....through college, and she said that it was never this hard before. Everyone that knew my wife and Belle knew that they had a VERY special relationship.

The vet called yesterday. He is taking this very hard also. He is still trying to figure out what went wrong. He talked with some other vets on Thursday and was compiling all of Belle's results from when she was a puppy to bring down to Cornell to talk with some of the professors there.

There are a lot of people that are missing Belle very much and I need to talk with them about getting another dog sometime. What should we do?

Thanks for you help everyone.

P.S. I'd like to tell you more about Belle but it is still too hard to write about her. /forums/images/graemlins/frown.gif

lamarbur · Nov 15, 2003

We went through a similar situation just over a year ago. House was empty, real empty.. Someone where my wife works suggested looking into various dog shelters. Two or jsut over two months go by, after wife spent almost every single eveining checking various shelters. Came a cross a puupy we both really liked.> Called on it, made arrangements and drove 80 miles to get the pup. He had a terrible short life up to that point, most documented,, anyhow, he has been here jsut over a year now and we gain extreme enjoyment from him each and every day..

MossRoad · Nov 15, 2003

Best medicine is a puppy. There are millions of them waiting at the pounds. All of the animals that we had over the years either came from the pound or wandered up to our houses with the exception of one Cairn Terrier(Max) that the breeder wanted to give away because he was defective(too big to show). At the pound, there always seems to be any breed that you can imagine and even more mutts(the best "breed" in my humble opinion /forums/images/graemlins/grin.gif). My 10 year old daughter went to humane society camp last summer. She spent a week at the pound and I know they had goldens there because she wanted to take them home. Our neighbors have a golden... it is the world's oldest puppy! Runs around like a nut and is very friendly and loyal. The kids love her.

A co-worker of mine lost his golden after about 10-11 years. It had survived hip removal, tumors, car accident and died of old age. He was extrememly upset. Best cure for him was he went out and got 2 more golden pups. They take him for a two mile walk every morning. /forums/images/graemlins/laugh.gif

Anyway, take the experience, knowledge and love that you have for goldens and apply it to another one, or two! You will never regret it. Hope this helps. Hang in there. /forums/images/graemlins/smile.gif

jfh230 · Nov 15, 2003

<font color="blue"> There are a lot of people that are missing Belle very much and I need to talk with them about getting another dog sometime. What should we do? </font>

I have had dogs all my life. Always treated them as part of the family which makes their passing all the more difficult.

There is never a correct time to get a new dog. You will need to mourn for Belle first. You'll know when the time is right. I have always avoided getting a new dog immediately after the passing of one. Just didn't seem right to the memory of the dog we lost and I knew it wouldn't be fair to the new dog. It would just be to easy to always compare it to how our old dog use to be and not let it become the dog it wants to be. A little time is not a bad thing and it will give everyone a chance to get ready and make room in their hearts for a new friend who will be different than Belle. But will be great in their own way.

Jack

rdam · Nov 17, 2003

Kevin,

I'm sorry for your loss. From personal experience, I know how hard it is. Belle was beautiful.

My wife and I had to put our 11 year old "Lucky" to sleep in January. We have no children, she was our child. She died in my arms. It was the hardest thing I've ever done, no exaggeration. I cried for hours.

We had her cremated and keep her ashes on a shelf in the living room.

My wife and I work odd shifts (Nurse/Cop) and found it unbearable coming home to an empty house. In March we went to the local pound and adopted "Peanut". Again, our only child.

I agree with Jack, It doesn't "seem right" to run out and try to replace Belle. It's not fair to you, the kids, or Belle's memory. However, when the time is right, PLEASE go to your local pound or ASPCA and adopt. Both Lucky and Peanut were adopted locally. It's a great feeling.

I'm sure Belle and Lucky have met at Rainbow Bridge along with the others. We'll see them again.

Aagin, I'm very sorry for your loss. My best to you and your family.

Rick Jay · Nov 17, 2003

Kevin,

Please accept my belated condolensces to your family regarding the loss of such a beloved pet.

We had to have our Shepherd/Retriever mix "Shadow" put down in the summer of '01. One of the hardest jobs I've ever done with my Kubota is to dig her grave. Not hard as in difficult, it's just hard to operate a loader with tears in your eyes. /forums/images/graemlins/frown.gif

I also know the emptiness you are feeling in your house. Words can't describe it. The doorbell rings...someone knocks on a wall...you drop a cookie on the floor...all things in which the dog would normally instantly respond...and now nothing...just silence.

Time will slowly heal the hurt. You need to keep fresh all the good memories you have. /forums/images/graemlins/smile.gif And when you feel the time is right be sure to add another dog (or two) to your family. /forums/images/graemlins/smile.gif

Peace, my friend.

~Rick

higgy · Nov 17, 2003

My lab has cancer and just a few days left. Eyes are still bright and the will is there. This week end I dug his grave. All the while he was playing fetch and being his wonderful self.

Man that afternoon was not the best I will say that.

The kids, 2.5 and 5 have been told, but they have no way of knowing what is going on. It will be hard for all.

Death is part of the system, we learn from it as well. I will try and make the best from the situation as many here have done.

Gary_in_Indiana · Nov 19, 2003

It was cancer that took my Golden years ago. My neighbor behind me at the time was a physician at a nearby hospital. He and his wife were big fans of Corey. When they heard of the diagnosis, she suggested a plan.

Long story short is that Corey got late night cancer treatments at the "people" hospital. The nurses there all fell in love with her and loved it when she came in. They quietly looked around corners and hustled her in and out without any problems.

I swear that Corey knew that we were sneaking around, too. She would walk down those tile hallways with her head lowered like she was on the prowl without so much as a nail clicking on the floor or a tag clinking on her collar. We used to tease that she'd gone into 'stealth mode' there. /forums/images/graemlins/grin.gif

It all paid off as it gave her well over another year of quality time with us. She was a wonderful friend and companion and I miss her still.

higgy · Nov 19, 2003

That is great, If I could do the same I would. Soby is a big part of the family and we will miss him greatly. I will speak to the vet and see if anything like this can be accomplished. Regardless, I would not do anything different. He has made our life so much nicer and is truly part of who we are.

We will enjoy him until he goes then we will laugh and cry about the things he did for a bit, then we will remember him always.

kevincook · Dec 9, 2003

I just thought I would update everyone.

The vet. called me back today with a bunch of information regarding what happened to Belle. We didn't do an autopsy so we will never know for sure but the vet. is convinced that Belle had cancer. He has spoken with several other vets about Belle's symptoms and test results. The general concensus is that even if we had made it to Cornell the morning she died (she had a appointment already scheduled there) that there wouldn't have been anything they could do. Belle's bone marrow wasn't able to produce new white cells which was the thing that finally conviced the vets that cancer was the problem.....along with a stack of other test results.

Belle never seemed to be in any pain so I guess that is a blessing. The night before she died I was out in the yard chasing her around. She was a great retriever but she also loved to play "keep away" with me. I never could catcher her....even that night she seemed as fast as ever. At 5:30am the next morning she just looked up and said goodbye to my wife without ever making a sound. I sure will miss her!

On a more positive note. One of Belle's sisters had puppies on October 15th and my wife is really fond of the idea of owning a puppy at least related to Belle. So we are going to pick up a new puppy this week. I thought it would be better to wait a while but my wife and kids really miss having a dog around. The puppies seem great...we have spent about 4 hours visiting them on two different occassions and I think every knows that no puppy will ever be just like Belle, but they will have their own personality. I don't want to new dog to be a replacement, just a new family member.

Again, thanks for everyone's support.
Kevin

PondKeeper · Dec 9, 2003

Kevin, that sounds like the best plan, when you think you're ready it usually means you are!

There are never replacements, just new companions ready to join your family. It is nice to have a blood tie back to Belle. When we lost our AnnaBelle we were fortunate to have one of her sons. He turned 9 last week, and is healthy today, he is the sole survivor of our Annie's litter of 9. Most gone to cancer also, nasty disease. Every day we have him we are thankful for another day. At nine he keeps up with our puppy who is now two. I got her a month after we lost our Annie.

The attached scan is my Annie and her son Brewster.

Enjoy the new addition.

Mike

Kyle_in_Tex · Dec 11, 2003

Good that your letting your kids spend some time getting to know the puppies. Watch out, you may end up with more than one new member of the family if a consenses can't be made for which one.

My first Golden was a female, currently I have a 10 year old male. I loved different traits about both sexes for different reasons.
Females: Mature(calm down) about 2 yrs old. Takes about 4 years to wind down a male.
Females have female problems sometimes. Males have problems running off chasing females with problems.

It sure seems strange how so many dogs are getting cancer these days. Makes me wonder if its something to do with their food, or maybe the new flea meds. Sure wish someone could figure it out. They say to spay/neuter just as soon as you can if you aren't going to breed your pet helps the situation.
Anyway, Good hearing from you...Kyle

Junkman · Dec 11, 2003

Cancer in dogs is no more prevalent today than in the past. Today, it is more recognizable at an earlier stage because of better training and knowledge about the disease. It has nothing to do with the food or the insecticides that are used in my opinion. If anything, the better foods and better medicine are helping the dogs to live longer and happier lives... /forums/images/graemlins/smile.gif

Gary_in_Indiana · Dec 17, 2003

<font color="blue"> we are going to pick up a new puppy this week </font>

Good for you. /forums/images/graemlins/wink.gif Make sure we see some pictures. /forums/images/graemlins/smile.gif

kevincook · Dec 17, 2003

Here is a picture of Sky. She seems to be adjusting to her new home well. Best of all she already knows to go to the door and bark when she need to go out.

We all still miss Belle terribly but are having fun with the new puppy.

Thanks,
Kevin

Inspector507 · Dec 17, 2003

Kevin,
Sky is just beautiful.
Just remember that Belle can never be replaced, just like any other member of your family can't be replaced. But Sky seems to have found a new family who is so full of love and devotion.
A pet is missed terribly, but finding a new outlet to share that love is a great feeling. Glad things are going so well for Sky, she needs a family to love her like you obviously do.

Jerry