Grandparents, Uncles and Aunts... have times really changed so much?

[MossRoad]

I suspect that most of us are afraid our kids and grandkids might do the same things we did.

My mom and dad told me some of the "crazy" things they did when they were kids. Sorry mom and dad, but what they did does not compare to what I and my friends were in to. YIKES! We're lucky no one died. Some got arrested (they deserved it, of course). Some got away with it (and shouldn't have). You, being a police officer for so many years, would have a better understanding than my folks did. I wish my folks would have stopped me from doing some of the stuff I was doing in my teens. They had to have known, for crying out loud! I couldn't have been that sneaky? I think a lot of parents put the blinders on rather than dealing with teen problems as soon as they pop up. Knowing what I did, I do not see my daughter and her friends getting in to that as early as I did. We (her friends' parents and us) keep a pretty good eye on that group of kids. They are all A+ students that haven't gotten into any trouble yet.... but hey, she is turning 16 real soon and cars give you the freedom to get away from your folks. . So, we just keep telling them that they are good kids and haven't given us any reasons not to trust them yet. If they enjoy their freedom, all they have to do is keep on the straight and narrow. Its worked so far.

As for the 11 year old, she runs around with her friends just as I did at that age, except for the open fields and woods.... there aren't any open fields and woods any more around our house. All houses. And, some nutty folks, too. I do remember some odd balls around our neighborhood when I was a kid, too. But not as many as I see now.

 

[ultrarunner]

It was me. I rather un-tactfully tried to make three points:

1) It's my opinion that kids today aren't nearly as bad as they are typically portrayed in these types of threads.
2) Most kids I know (including my own) don't fit the stereotypes.
3) Folks that find themselves consistently critical of the younger generation(s) should stop and ask themselves why they do it.

I honestly never meant to be some sort of champion of the younger generation or something. I'm just a guy with an observation. I had a good exchange of messages with one of the moderators about it after my post was deleted. It was useful.

Sorry if anybody was insulted.

Chet.

I do believe kids reflect the environment in which they are raised... good or bad.

I know many kids that are much brighter than I ever was at their age and some would probably give me a run for my money at any age... thankfully with age comes experience, or we'd probably all be in trouble.

My comment was more a reflection on how it is harder to be a kid today. The simple things I enjoyed as a child are things my own nieces and nephews, sadly, won't have the opportunity to experience.

Call it over protective parents or just the reality of the world we live...

Each year around the holidays, I make it a point to drop off a small Holiday gift to people I do business with... I thought it would be nice to take one of my nieces or nephews with me to share in the spirit of giving just as I did with my Grandparents and Parents at that same age.

The parents quickly dismissed the idea as much too dangerous... just wasn't safe for the kids to tag along for a couple of hours in the big city where anything could happen. It's ironic because it's the city where I still live and where they were raised... nothing ever happened to us... but you would never know it from reading the evening paper or turning on the news...

 

[Sigarms]

Some thoughts from wiser men than myself

"Each generation needs a new revolution" Thomas Jefferson

"Each generation imagines itself to be more intelligent than the one before it, and wiser than the one after it" George Orwell

"Nothing seperates the generations more than music. By the time a child is eight or nine, he has developed a passion for his own music that is even stronger than his passion for procrastination and weird clothes" Bill Cosby

"Cause the good old days werent always good, and tomorrow aint as bad as it seems" Billy Joel "Keeping the Faith"

For myself, people to some extent are a product of their enviroment. As mentioned before in another thread, I do find it interesting how technology has had an impact on our society, for better or worse.

Each year around the holidays, I make it a point to drop off a small Holiday gift to people I do business with... I thought it would be nice to take one of my nieces or nephews with me to share in the spirit of giving just as I did with my Grandparents and Parents at that same age.

The parents quickly dismissed the idea as much too dangerous... just wasn't safe for the kids to tag along for a couple of hours in the big city where anything could happen. It's ironic because it's the city where I still live and where they were raised... nothing ever happened to us... but you would never know it from reading the evening paper or turning on the news...

Don't tell me you don't carry a handgun?

 

[MossRoad]

My girls are way past their parents, aunts and uncles for their ages as far as grades, intelligence, etc... goes. That is encouraging. And they both prefer classic rock over modern music. That makes it downright rewarding to be a parent!

However, I've noticed that they and their friends, both male and female, have no sense of direction (compass wise, not life wise). They cannot find their way around town. I wonder why that is? I make them tell me how to get to places, hoping that they will develop a sense of direction, but many times they think they are on the south side of town when we are on the north. I think there's some disruption in the magnetic field.

 

[chetlenox]

Ha! Sig, I think your Orwell quote fits many of us to a "T", myself included.

Chet.

 

[AlanB]

Others have said it, and I will echo, too me it is about striking a balance with your kids and their safety.

Lord knows I struggle with it constantly.

My wife and I are lucky that we see things in pretty much the same light, and we are blessed to have family that's view of what is "safe" vaires widely.

I have one sister who was unbelievably cautious with her daughters (only ride bicycles on the flat parts, one person on the Tramp etc. etc.) to some of my BIL who when my son came in (I think he was 10) to tell me what a good day he had with uncle Ludwig in the woods, they taught him to use the chainsaw (and too be safe, yeah, right) and let him drive the Unimog back and forth from the woods to town........... AAACCCCKKKKKKKKKK

I think the funniest part is how the young soldiers come through now, and tell me that the "Young soldiers" don't have it tough like "they" did coming up through the ranks.

I can remember having the same conversations, and think it will continue on well past me as well.

 

[AlanB]

However, I've noticed that they and their friends, both male and female, have no sense of direction (compass wise, not life wise). They cannot find their way around town. I wonder why that is? I make them tell me how to get to places, hoping that they will develop a sense of direction, but many times they think they are on the south side of town when we are on the north. I think there's some disruption in the magnetic field.

Maybe they are German and you don't know it

Took me a while to figure out what the problem was, but Germans (and many other countries) don't navigate the way we do. They navigate by the direction of a major known point, such as Drive in the direction of Nurenburg instead of go north.

I know it is not the case but just thought I would share what I always found to be interesting.

Nowdays, my German wife knows our town better then most as in the landscaping business she ends up covering it pretty well.

 

[NuBota]

I struggle with this all of the time. Having four kids ranging from 18 to 6 (oops!) it is a challenge to balance trying to impart responsibility and self-sufficiency with providing security and a "quality of life" (i.e. spoiled) we may not have had.

I think the population growth has a lot to do with safety. We live in the same town I was in since 10 years old - has gone from a rural tobacco farming area to large suburb/city. Traffic is crazy compared to then - so the teens driving is a little worrisome. There might be the same ratio of crazies out there, but it does seem that we are either more aware nowadays and those types are more bold/brazen in their attempts. We lost 1 kid to an auto accident when I was in HS, the teenagers have experienced about 6. There have been 3 or 4 abduction attempts at bus stops - none I can remember when I was growing up. There are "gangs" in all the high schools and have been multiple gun incidents - in my day - just some fist fights and "rumbles"

As far as self-reliance, I am convinced we are an entitlement culture nowadays. After 15+ years of coaching kids sports, where you can't teach competition or "correct" mistakes. Your expected to praise lil' Johnny whether he puts forth an effort or not. I dread to think what the poor teachers struggle with. My kids all get good grades and are in advanced curriculum - and they are always loaded with homework -and frustrated - their friends get off the bus with no books and go right out to play - and get essentially the same grades. Try explaining to a 10 yo that their hard work now will pay dividends later. And the teens see things like the bailouts and are smart enough to realize that people can get rewarded for being stupid and lazy - very hard to teach honor, morals, and accountability in the face of that culture.

I have taught both teenagers how to change oil, rotate tires, change brakes, run a chainsaw, circular saw, etc. One "gets it" and is fairly proficient - the other has no interest and has absolutely no aptitude. Both hate physical work. The 18yo bought his first car back in March. I paid cash outright for a 10 year old car - he is making monthly payments @ 4% and the car is still in my name. And he pays his share of insurance. He grumbled at first and still does frequently, but actually thanked me the other day - said he felt good being responsible for it - compared to his friends that get a free ride. (Of course, he could be playing me for something else...)

My kids are very well behaved and respectful when in public - and the DW and I are pretty strict - at least by most peoples standards - we get funny looks and comments all the time for correcting what most others deem acceptable behavior in kids. But we also spoil them a little too much at times. Like I said - tough balance.

Bottom line - I hope the things we have taught and pounded in these kids are at least sitting there latent in their minds and will be remembered when the need arises - but only time will tell.....

 

[TCowner]

Go into a room of whipper snappers and ask a few history questions and it will scare you with their responses. I work with a nice cross section of geezers (I'm one) and whipper snappers. Ask some very basic questions like the approximate date of the Japanese attack on Pearl Harbor and be prepared for some interesting responses. Of course the public school system doesn't think that date it very important. The dropping of the atomic bombs on Japan of course requires a two day reflection on the horrible devastation inflicted by the ruthless Americans. Our peace lovers in SE Minnesota like to light lanterns and sing songs in honor of those who died in 1945 but do nothing to honor our servicemen who died in 1941.

When I advise the youngins of their mistakes they have a fairly common response, "that was before I was born." One said the two bombs were dropped in the early 90s because George Bush Sr. (at least she was right who was president) was really angry with the Japanese over some trade issues.

So again, ask a few of these questions and get ready for few laughs. It probably explains why Jano Leno's "Jay Walking" is one of the funniest segments on TV.

 

[Ken_CT]

OK, I'll try this again here.
Ronald Reagan was once challenged by a student who accused the older generation of being irrelevant because they hadn't grown up with computers, jet travel or high-speed communication technology. Reagan responded, you're absolutely right. We didn't have those things when we were your age. We invented them.