Yeah, I really hate to read about your troubles. Problems with emissions equipment is something I've never experienced (I run pre-emissions trucks and tractors), and don't want.
I read somewhere recently about a TYM owner that had a couple of DPF errors pop up, and on his 2nd visit to the dealer, the tech drilled a few "pressure relief holes" in the guts of the DPF, and it's been smooth sailing since then.
I'm sure that somebody smarter than me can figure out how many & what sized holes through a clogged DPF would match the flow rate of a clean DPF. Somebody should do those calculations, you know, for Science!
If I remember right, that owner, like you, lived in northern US where winter temps would make it hard for exhaust to warm up much.
Speaking of winter temps: Are the temps you posted above in Celcius, or Farenheit (they sound like they've got to be C)?